Every Friday one of my dear friends comes and takes me to my treatments and anywhere else I need to go. Now that I am getting so sore, it really helps me out. I am glad for the time that we get to spend together. Life some times has a way of just getting so busy that you miss the special things...going through something like Cancer seems to help bring priorities back into focus.
Today at my therapy, I spoke to one of the other survivor's there and she brought her $85.00 cream to put on after her treatment. Since her appointment is after mine, she mentioned that I should try her cream. So after my 23rd session I put on her cream. It is suppose to have numbing agents in it but honestly, I couldn't feel any difference. Glad that I tried that before I bought something that costs that much. I still have issue's with that whole expensive cream deal, but I always thought that the least they could do is give out samples to see if survivor's could really feel the difference, then they could make the decision whether to sink that much money into something like that. Today when I put my arms above my head to get into position for radiation, I felt two more areas crack open underneath my arm, it is getting harder and harder to hold still, hurting this much.
I got to go to my chiropractor today, it hurt to be adjusted (from a skin point of view) but man, does it ever give me relief for my back and neck. I can tell that I am favoring my arm by the way I have to hold it up and away from my body,(it looks as if I am getting ready to sing the I'M A LITTLE TEA POT song) that in turn hurts my neck...oh well, some days I struggle to see how this poor body will ever make it to my 50th birthday!
When I got home today and after I took my nap, I had another Angel visit. She came in with a van full of food, flowers, aloe plant and anything else that she thought my family needed. It was another one of those times that you can't imagine how you could ever say THANKS enough! The kids were so excited to see that much food, that you would have thought it was Christmas around here. Jeff said to me after she left..."Lynn, you are truly a RICH women to have so many BEST FRIENDS who love and support you!" He was right!
The pain is getting so bad that I have realized that I am no longer going to be able to wear my MRS. DOUBTFIRE OUTFIT (camisole). It isn't as tight as a bra, but it is still made of lycra and tight enough under my arm to make it almost unbearable now. I realize by making this decision that I probably won't be out in public as much. Maybe no one will care, but it is obvious when you only have one breast and I don't want to make other people uncomfortable. I honestly don't know if I am there yet, to do something like that. I wish it was colder so maybe I could just wear a big coat around everywhere. But also because the burn is getting so bad, I am nervous about even having the seat belt on me and afraid of getting a hug now from anyone.
I need to keep reminding myself ...THAT THIS WON'T LAST FOREVER!
"From a moment to moment, one can bear much." ___Teresa of Avila
I will focus on the service and love that has been shown to me and my family. I am sore, I am tired, I am hurting but...I am blessed to have soooooo many ANGELS all around me. Thank you for everything from your thoughts, prayers to phone calls, rides and meals....yes, I am truly RICH!!!!!!
"Compassion for me is just what the word says it is: it is "suffering with." it is an immediate participation in the suffering of another to such a degree that you forget yourself and your own safety and act spontaneously." ___Joseph Campbell
"The joy that compassion brings is one of the best-kept secrets of humanity. It is a secret known only to very few people, a secret that has to be rediscovered over and over again." ____Henri J. M. Nouwen