Sunday, February 27, 2011

The Three R's

Today in church the talks were about the Three R's, I will share my notes on it and hopefully they will make sense to you .

Every single day we are called upon to make choices of some sort. Some are far-reaching while others may be trivial. Some will make no difference in the eternal scheme of things, and others will make all the difference. The Three R's that were talked about were...
Right of choices
Responsibility of choice
Results of choice.

Right of choice is given to everyone, we all have agency to choose for ourselves. It seems like the messages of the Adversary are all around us, as a Mother I am very aware of how hard and how fast these messages are coming to not only me, but to my children and grandchildren. I am sure all of you have heard them, they go something like this....Don't worry; no one will know." "You can stop smoking or drinking or taking drugs any time you want." "Everybody's doing it, so it can't be that bad." "Come on, just this once.", sound familiar? These are coming at us at an alarming rate from the TV, Internet, movies and papers.

Next is Responsibility of our Choices...

If and when we make the wrong choice, we need to blame ourselves not others. In the New Testament we read what the Apostle Paul said about this very subject..."There hath no temptation taken  you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye my be able to bear it."   ~ 1 Corinthians 10:13

Next the speaker read these words from a talk by Thomas S. Monson...

"Although in our journey we will encounter forks and turnings in the road, we simply cannot afford the luxury of a detour from which we may never return.

Let us not find ourselves as indecisive as is Alice in Lewis Carroll’s classic Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. You will remember that she comes to a crossroads with two paths before her, each stretching onward but in opposite directions. She is confronted by the Cheshire cat, of whom Alice asks, “Which path shall I follow?”

The cat answers, “That depends where you want to go. If you do not know where you want to go, it doesn’t matter which path you take.” 7

Unlike Alice, we all know where we want to go, and it does matter which way we go, for by choosing our path, we choose our destination.

Decisions are constantly before us. To make them wisely, courage is needed—the courage to say no, the courage to say yes. Decisions do determine destiny."

Then the last R was the Results of our Choices... Every single choice that we make has consequences, some good and some bad. We need to be well aware of the effects and results of our choices, they not only effect us alone but all those that are around  us. When we have to stand up against something that is wrong, we need to remember that we are never alone in doing what is right! Our Heavenly Fathers stands by, to bless us for those good choices that we make. We need to go to Him in prayer for strength and courage to make the right choices, because it will make all the difference in the world to do so!

I hope these notes made sense to you, I was writing pretty fast. You can read the talk that the readers were referring to, by going here...http://lds.org/general-conference/2010/10/the-three-rs-of-choice?lang=eng

It was a great reminder to me to be grateful for my ability to choose, to be responsible for my choices and to be aware of the results of my choices! Neat topic, one we can all benefit from. Have a great Sunday!

 

“Next to the bestowal of life itself, the right to direct that life is God’s greatest gift to man.”                   ~ David O. McKay

"The road signs of life enticingly invite every traveler: This way to fame; this way to affluence; this way to popularity; this way to luxury. Pause at the crossroads before you continue your journey. Listen for that still, small voice which ever so gently beckons, "Come, follow me." This way to Jericho."   ~ Thomas S. Monson Ensign, May 1977

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Tough days.

A dear friend of mine had surgery over a week ago. I had been praying that it would go well, and that soon she would be back on the road to healing. I remember how nerve wrecking it is to have to wait on lab tests to come back, with that on top of hurting...it makes for very tough days! I called and we got to talk for quite awhile, I know she is in a lot of pain, and yet when I talked about the thing that helps me the most on the days that are very, very tough on me...it was doing service for someone else. Even if it was just to pray and see if someone could use a card, or a phone call. At least I felt like I was not thinking so much about me, and for a moment I felt better. I know that sounds a bit odd, but I promise you all that it works. Service truly does lift the gloom from your heart and replaces it with compassion. Try it and see for yourself!

"When you find yourselves a little gloomy, look around you and find somebody that is in a worse plight than yourself; to to him and find out what the trouble is, then try to remove it with the wisdom which the Lord bestows upon you; and the first thing you know, your gloom is gone, you feel light, the Spirit of the Lord is upon you, and everything seems illuminated."   ~ Lorenzo Snow

"The more we serve our fellowmen in appropriate ways, the more substance there is to our souls."   ~ Spencer W. Kimball

"Often small acts of service are all that is required to lift and bless another."  ~ Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Friday, February 25, 2011

Marriage class number 4!

Tonight was our 4th marriage class. I have to admit, at first I wasn't sure I wanted to go, because I was sure I probably already knew most of the stuff that we should or should not do in our marriage. We had some friends that wanted to go and so we decided to do it as a foursome. It has been incredible, and maybe I did already know most of the things that have been taught, but the teacher is so passionate about making  your marriage not only work... but making it be the BEST, has been very enlightening.

I am guilty of just getting stuck at times in my marriage. I let my perspective get out of focus and that is detrimental to our relationship. Pretty soon all I can see if the things that drive me crazy or things that are still not working, and I focus in on them and as you can imagine ...that doesn't bring very much happiness into the home. I have learned that even though I am pretty sure that most of our problems are because of Jeff  :) ( just kidding )  ,it doesn't take long for me to learn that the only person I can change is me. I usually have to start with changing my thoughts, and then focus only on the good. It is funny that you have to work that hard at times but ...I think marriage is hard, one of the hardest (but best) things I have ever done.

Not only do you start with opposites, a man and a woman (which we have learned all the differences that come from that) but then you also come from different life experiences and backgrounds, so that changes how you see or act toward certain things. Then you add in children to that mix and your different experiences or opinions on how to raise and parent them. Then you add in finances, health or lack of it and ....well, did I already say how hard marriage is?

Tonight our focus was ...it is worth the effort we put into it! We should never give up, but continue to try to make it the very best we can. Forgiving, forgetting and practicing patience every single day, hour and minute. We need to be careful on how hard we judge each other, and truly try to focus on the positive. We talked about how the good and bad in our marriages, effect our children, and how we need to be very aware of that. How we need to understand it is our responsibility to make our marriages the best, so that we set the proper example for our kids. We need to put each other first, even before ourselves. Yes, I am glad that our friends and us decided to take this class, I don't think any one can learn TOO MUCH about preserving our relationships and our marriages. It is a vital part of our lives and our home and we need to keep working on it! The bottom line is ...you need to keep trying, over and over again! Because when all is right between Jeff and I, everything is right with the world! It truly is worth it!

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"The more you invest in a marriages, the more valuable it becomes."  ~ Amy Grant 

"Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate."  ~Barnett R. Brickner

"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."  ~Mignon McLaughlin

Each person is important!

Tonight at my house, we held a baby shower for a friend of mine. We were worried about the weather, especially since school has been canceled for the last 2 days. We had a great turn out though, over 22 ladies came! I love the idea of having a baby shower to celebrate all this amazing little people that come to earth. They should be celebrated, they are important people, and the sooner we all could learn this... the better off we would be in our lives!  Another friend brought her little 2 1/2 week old baby, yes...I love this little precious spirits! I wish I could have had a ton of them, well not really that many. Four was a good number for Jeff and I and now I have my sweet granddaughters!

It is late, and I am beyond...so I will say good night and thank all those who came to welcome another little new one into the world soon! It is so exciting. I just wish I could be Aunt Lynn to all of them!

"If you could only sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to the people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person."
Fred Rogers

"A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on."
Carl Sandburg

"A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for."

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

The Magic Pebbles

I love this story, plus it comes with it's own quotes! Read it, you will love it!

The Magic Pebbles

"Why do we have to learn all of this dumb stuff?"

Of all the complaints and questions I have heard from my students during my years in the classroom, this was the one most frequently uttered. I would answer it by recounting the following legend.

One night a group of nomads were preparing to retire for the evening when suddenly they were surrounded by a great light. They knew they were in the presence of a celestial being. With great anticipation, they awaited a heavenly message of great importance that they knew must be especially for them.

Finally, the voice spoke, "Gather as many pebbles as you can. Put them in your saddle bags. Travel a day's journey and tomorrow night will find you glad and it will find you sad."

After having departed, the nomads shared their disappointment and anger with each other. They had expected the revelation of a great universal truth that would enable them to create wealth, health and purpose for the world. But instead they were given a menial task that made no sense to them at all. However, the memory of the brilliance of their visitor caused each one to pick up a few pebbles and deposit them in their saddle bags while voicing their displeasure.

They traveled a day's journey and that night while making camp, they reached into their saddle bags and discovered every pebble they had gathered had become a diamond. They were glad they had diamonds. They were sad they had not gathered more pebbles.

It was an experience I had with a student, I shall call Alan, early in my teaching career that illustrated the truth of that legend to me.

When Alan was in the eighth grade, he majored in "trouble" with a minor in "suspensions." He had studied how to be a bully and was getting his master's in "thievery."

Every day I had my students memorize a quotation from a great thinker. As I called roll, I would begin a quotation. To be counted present, the student would be expected to finish the thought.

"Alice Adams - 'There is no failure except ...’"

"’In no longer trying.' I'm present, Mr. Schlatter."

So, by the end of the year, my young charges would have memorized 150 great thoughts.

"Think you can, think you can't - either way you're right!"

"If you can see the obstacles, you've taken your eyes off the goal."

"A cynic is someone who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing."

And, of course, Napoleon Hill's "If you can conceive it, and believe it, you can achieve it."

No one complained about this daily routine more than Alan - right up to the day he was expelled and I lost touch with him for five years. Then one day, he called. He was in a special program at one of the neighboring colleges and had just finished parole.

He told me that after being sent to juvenile hall and finally being shipped off to the California Youth Authority for his antics, he had become so disgusted with himself that he had taken a razor blade and cut his wrists.

He said, "You know what, Mr. Schlatter, as I lay there with my life running out of my body, I suddenly remembered that dumb quote you made me write 20 times one day. ‘There is no failure except in no longer trying.' Then it suddenly made sense to me. As long as I was alive, I wasn't a failure, but if I allowed myself to die, I would most certainly die a failure. So with my remaining strength, I called for help and started a new life."

At the time he had heard the quotation, it was a pebble. When he needed guidance in a moment of crisis, it had become a diamond. And so it is to you I say, gather all the pebbles you can, and you can count on a future filled with diamonds.

By John Wayne Schlatter
from A 2nd Helping of Chicken Soup for the Soul

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Perspective

  I have a dear friend of mine has a family member that has brain cancer. This person is just a 3 year old little boy ( a twin also). The parents are blogging the whole experience to let people know how he is doing, and probably to document and help themselves remember this life altering experience.

  As I read their blog, you can't help but be sad and worried for the young boy and his family. Even though we don't know them personally, we pray for them daily and hope that they can just handle each day as it comes. They have a great and strong faith and that in and of it's self ...is a life saver ( we know from personal experience ).
   So tonight I am leaving with you some inspirational quotes, and hopefully it will be a comfort for any of you who are struggling with BIG PROBLEMS in your life! Perspective really is a wonderful thing!

           "When you look at a massive problem it is good to remember about
eating an elephant. There is only one way to eat it. One piece at a
time. The sea is vast but the sea is just drops of water and each drop
counts"
  – Desmand Tutu

 

"Everyone and everything around you is your teacher."    ~Ken Keyes, Jr.

"Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors."  ~ Proverb

 

Monday, February 21, 2011

Hard times

My son had to work on a project tonight on his computer, and so I am just now getting him off to bed and sitting down at my computer. Teenagers...you gotta love'em!

I am so tired that I believe instead of staying up to the wee hours of the morning, I will share a couple of quotes that have helped me along my road of hard times.

I was talking to a young friend of mine tonight, who was home so that she could have surgery on her shoulder. She told me about all the pain and trouble she was having with it and how it had finally got so bad that it was time to come home and check into surgery. After listening and truly understanding how hard times feel when you are right in the middle of them, she asked me..."so how are you doing?" I couldn't believe it, but I said..."I am doing great!" It still shocks me to hear myself say it. For soooooo many years I have been fighting either cancer, pain, pneumonia, and fatigue. All I can remember saying for the past 3 -4 years was " I am really tired".

Now tonight I am really tired, but that is because it is late. Now that I am sleeping 8-9 hours a night, I am doing amazingly well! I still have my back and neck pain, but even that feels better. The fatigue has changed a lot. I still take a nap during the day, but when I am awake, I just feel better!

Silly as it seems, I am grateful for the hard times that have taught me so much!

If you are going through your own hard times, please remember to never give up and keep the faith!

“Opposition is a natural part of life. Just as we develop our physical muscles through overcoming opposition - such as lifting weights - we develop our character muscles by overcoming challenges and adversity.”       ~ Stephen R. Covey 

“The greater the obstacle, the more glory in overcoming it.”  ~ Moliere 

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Needs verses Wants

This is what our marriage class was about this weekend. I am so glad that we chose to go to these classes, I believe any couple could benefit from them. Needs verses wants is a huge thing in a marriage. Here are a few notes that I took, along with a neat quote about how we should feel toward our spouse, plus a incredible Indian proverb that reminds us to keep our needs and wants in check throughout our marriages!

NOTES...

If we try  to meet the needs of our spouse, then our needs will be met!

We need to make sure that we keep our thoughts and actions in check. It is easy to fall back into the same bad habits and patterns that we have had throughout out marriage, thus making life miserable for the both of us.

Changing a habit can be hard... but it is possible, it just depends on how bad you want it.

In Martial Arts ( I think that is how you spell it?)...you learn how to do things with great power but not great strength. When you stay relaxed and focused you have much more power to handle a situation.

There are things in our marriages that we need to just let go of. Continuing to fight and argue brings contention in our homes. When met with aggression it is important not to connect with it, if you do then, you both are locked into it and there is just a power struggle and no one really wins. ( Now, he was not talking about physically getting in fights or abuse of any type, that is not to ever be tolerated ). He was suggesting more that, many times we fuss and fight about things in our marriages that really don't serve us, his suggestion was to be bigger than the situation and yet also to try to be the first one to choose differently. Marriage is hard but it worth it!!!!

Two Wolves: A Cherokee Teaching

An elderly Cherokee Native American was teaching his grandchildren about life...
He said to them, "A fight is going on inside me, it is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.
One wolf is evil -- he is fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, competition, superiority, and ego.
The other is good---he is joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.
This same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too."
They thought about it for a minute and then one child asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"
The old Cherokee simply replied: "The one you feed".

 

 

“Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.”  ~ George Elliott

Friday, February 18, 2011

Live like you were dying!

I heard this song, and really liked the words. It is so true for those of us, who have faced life threatening situations, diseases or heartaches, we really appreciate life and it's moments more. So all of you that life has been kind to or relatively easy, then be very grateful. But still try to remember those who struggling, your kindness could make all the difference.

Artist: Tim McGraw
Song: Live Like You Were Dying
Lyrics: Craig Wiseman and Tim Nichols

He said I was in my early forties
with a lot of life before me
when a moment came that stopped me on a dime
and I spent most of the next days
looking at the x-rays
Talking bout the options
and talking bout sweet time
I asked him when it sank in
that this might really be the real end
how's it hit you when you get that kinda news
man what'd you do

and he said
I went sky diving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named FuManchu
and I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter
and I gave forgiveness I'd been denying
and he said someday I hope you get the chance
to live like you were dying.

He said I was finally the husband
that most the time I wasn't
and I became a friend a friend would like to have
and all the sudden going fishin
wasn't such an imposition
and I went three times that year I lost my dad
well I finally read the good book
and I took a good long hard look
at what I'd do if I could do it all again

and then
I went sky diving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named FuManchu
and I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter
and I gave forgiveness I'd been denying
and he said someday I hope you get the chance
to live like you were dying.

Like tomorrow was a gift and you got eternity to think about
what'd you do with it what did you do with it
what did I do with it
what would I do with it'

Sky diving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named FuManchu
and then I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter
and I watched an eagle as it was flying
and he said someday I hope you get the chance
to live like you were dying.

"You are not the momentary whim of a careless creator experimenting in the laboratory of life. . . You were made with a purpose."   Og Mandino

"There's three choices
In life.
Give up. Give in. Or give it all you've got."

ANT PHILOSOPHY

I found this neat article and thought I would share it with you. Enjoy
The Ant Philosophy

Over the years I've been teaching kids about a simple but powerful concept - the ant philosophy. I think everybody should study ants. They have an amazing four-part philosophy, and here is the first part: ants never quit. That's a good philosophy. If they're headed somewhere and you try to stop them; they'll look for another way. They'll climb over, they'll climb under, they'll climb around. They keep looking for another way. What a neat philosophy, to never quit looking for a way to get where you're supposed to go.

Second, ants think winter all summer. That's an important perspective. You can't be so naive as to think summer will last forever. So ants are gathering in their winter food in the middle of summer.

An ancient story says, "Don't build your house on the sand in the summer." Why do we need that advice? Because it is important to think ahead. In the summer, you've got to think storm. You've got to think rocks as you enjoy the sand and sun.

The third part of the ant philosophy is that ants think summer all winter. That is so important. During the winter, ants remind themselves, "This won't last long; we'll soon be out of here." And the first warm day, the ants are out. If it turns cold again, they'll dive back down, but then they come out the first warm day. They can't wait to get out.

And here's the last part of the ant philosophy. How much will an ant gather during the summer to prepare for the winter? All that he possibly can. What an incredible philosophy, the "all-that-you-possibly-can" philosophy.

Wow, what a great philosophy to have - the ant philosophy. Never give up, look ahead, stay positive and do all you can.

To Your Success,
Jim Rohn

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

You Can’t Always Believe What You Read or Hear!

When I was at my Cancer check up a few weeks ago, I picked up a magazine and began to thumb through it. I won't mention the magazine but it is popular and supposedly credible. I was shocked at one of the articles in there and thought this was a great example that you can't always believe what you read.

The article was about Gossip, here are some of the comments from it!

"Admit it, you love a good piece of gossip, Here's why it's not as bad of a habit as you might think....

*Gossip keeps us in line, according to a study done in 2004 at a university, they found out that gossip is good for you because it helps you release good brain chemicals.

*We also gossip to let other's know who we are. Say we pass on a juicy nugget about our neighbors infidelity offering our opinion about it, that let's you showoff your moral fiber.

*By gossiping, you can be reaffirming your values.

* I am sure in some ways we hurt productivity at the work place, but ultimately people are bonded by it.

*Since we don't know what other people are thinking, collecting information from and about them in  effect, playing amateur detective is as close as we can get to being inside their heads.

*We can't help ourselves Gossiping is part of our DNA. Think of it as survival instinct: in order to stay alive and thrive we gossip. We gossip to help us figure out whom to trust. It's a way to navigate our complicated social network.

Here is someone else's opinion on Gossiping. Check it out for yourself and see how feel. I personally couldn't believe the first article or half the things they said. But like the article below tells us ...there is an appetite out there in the world for it and so it will continue. My point tonight is to just compare the two and think about it!

  "Gossip - blurred truth - is a popular sport all over the world. We find it everywhere - on television, in newspapers, in magazines and on the Internet. So big is the business that there are professional Rumormongers whose work it is to discover and tell all. No matter how hurtful and destructive, there seem to be no limits to our appetite for public scandal. In spite of its popularity, I think we all know, on some level, that gossip is dishonest, destroys our integrity and compromises our personal authenticity. In the end it is our self-esteem that suffers the biggest loss. Regardless, we seem to love to talk about each other and often disguise it by saying, "This is not really gossip, I am just sharing information."

"Let us establish some clear standards. How do I know if I am gossiping? In my opinion, if you are passing information others need to know, you probably are not gossiping. If by all reasonable standards, others do not need to know the information you have, than you are gossiping. Second, you need to look at your intention. Why do you need/want to share the information you have about this person? Look within and if you see that your intentions are not good, hold your tongue. Third are you helping to create the scandal by blurring the Truth? When in doubt, apply the Triple Filter Test. This is a test that comes to us from the ancient Greek philosopher Socrates."

Here is the story:

One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said,
"Socrates, do you know what I just heard about your friend?"

"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before telling me anything, I would
like you to pass a little test. It is called the Triple Filter Test."

"Triple Filter?"

"That is right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my
friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you are
going to say. The first filter is truth. Have you made absolutely
sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and..."

"All right," said Socrates. "So you do not really know if it is true or
not. Now let us try the second filter, the filter of goodness. Is what
you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"

"No, on the contrary..."

"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him,
but you are not certain it is true. You may still pass the test though,
because there is one filter left: The filter of usefulness. Is what you
want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither true
nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"

To do:
~Avoid all gossip for 10 days.
~If you need to pass along information try using Socrates' Triple Filter test.
~If you are in conversation with someone and they start to gossip, figure out a way to excuse yourself.
~If you find yourself in circumstances where others are gossiping, try to move the discussion to another topic
~What does it mean to blur the truth?
~Think about how you feel when you gossip? Afterward?
~Why do you think people love to gossip?
http://ezinearticles.com/?Gossip-Hurts&id=4599470

"What you don't see with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth."  ~Jewish Proverb
"What is told in the ear of a man is often heard 100 miles away."
  ~Chinese Proverb
"No one gossips about other people's secret virtues."  ~Bertrand Arthur William Russell

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

What choices am I making each day?

This story was simple but profound! Enjoy!

The Emperor and the Horseman

A Long time ago, there was an Emperor who told his horseman that

if he could ride on his horse and cover as much land area as he likes,

then the Emperor would give him the area of land he has covered.

Sure enough, the horseman quickly jumped onto his horse and

rode as fast as possible to cover as much land area as he could.

He kept on riding and riding, whipping the horse to go as fast as possible.

When he was hungry,thirsty or tired, he did not stop because

he wanted to cover as much area as possible. Came to a point

when he had covered a substantial area and he was exhausted

and was dying. Then he asked himself, "Why did I pushed myself

so hard to cover so much land area? Now I am dying and

I only need a very small area to bury myself."

The above story is similar with the journey of our Life.

We push very hard everyday to make more money,

to gain power and recognition. We neglect our health, time with our family

and to appreciate the surrounding beauty and the hobbies we love to do.

One day when we look back, we will realize that we don't really need that much,

but then we cannot turn back time for what we have missed.

Life is not about making money, acquiring power or recognition.

Life is definitely not about work! Work is only necessary to keep us living

so as to enjoy the beauty and pleasures of life.

Moral of the story ...

Life is a balance of Work and Play, Family and Personal time.

You have to decide how you want to balance your Life.

Define your priorities, realize what you are able to compromise

but always let some of your decisions be based on your instincts.

Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of Life,

the whole aim of human existence. So, take it easy,

do what you want to do and appreciate nature. Life is fragile,

Life is short. Do not take Life for granted.

Live a balance lifestyle and enjoy Life!  ~ Unknown

 

"In every single thing you do, you are choosing a direction. Your life is a product of choices." Dr. Kathleen Hall, from Alter Your Life

“You may think that in life, a lot of things happen to you along the way. The truth is, in life, you happen to a lot of things along the way.”

“There may be a thousand little choices in a day. All of them count.”
http://lifelessons4u.wordpress.com/2009/05/28/26-quotes-on-choices/

Monday, February 14, 2011

Life is SWEET!

I usually make my Valentines each year to give to my friends. This year for one reason or another, I didn't get them made. So here is my Valentine to each of you tonight.
I want to personally thank you for being such a special part of my life! I feel blessed to have so many friends and family who love me, and that I love also.

Enjoy this sweet story and remember you are LOVED!  Happy Valentine's Day!

Twenty Valentines

"Oh," said Millicent, watching the postman's blue coat up the street. "I wish he would come here day after tomorrow and bring me twenty valentines!"

"Will he, Mitty?" Jimmy-Boy asked eagerly.

Millicent shook her head. "'Course not, Jimmy-Boy. I know only six little girls; I couldn't get but six."

Aunt Sara was listening. She was Millicent's very prettiest auntie from the city, and she nearly always found a way to help.

"How would you like to send twenty valentines?" she asked.

Millicent laughed. "Why, auntie, I couldn't send but six, either. I don't know any more girls. Besides, I haven't any more valentines."

"Suppose I should show you how to make twenty valentines, and find twenty little girls to send them to; would you like, to do it?"

Millicent came running from the window with Jimmy-Boy close behind her.

"I'd love to, auntie! Please show me right away."

"Love to, auntie, right away," echoed Jimmy-Boy.

"You can help," Aunt Sara promised. "You can bring the mucilage while Millicent gets the scissors."

When they came back with these, Aunt Sara had a pile of gay pictures on the table, and some sheets of thick white paper.

"We will cut this into hearts," she said, "and you can cut out these birds and flowers and paste them on. Let's see which can make the neatest and prettiest ones."

Jimmy-Boy had to be helped a little in cutting out pictures, but he had learned to paste neatly at kindergarten, and his valentines were so pretty it was hard for Aunt Sara to choose between his and Millicent's.

It was such fun making them that Millicent almost forgot about the twenty little girls they were to go to.

"Who are they, auntie?" she asked when she remembered. "Where do they live?"

"Away down in the city," Aunt Sara explained. "Each one in a little white bed in a Children's Hospital. I don't know their names, but I'll send them to the superintendent, and they will get them safely on Valentine's Day. You can't think how happy they will be."

"Oh, I just like to try to think!" cried Millicent. "I'm glad we made them so nice."

The twenty valentines went off in their white envelopes the next morning.

On Valentine's Day the postman brought Milly six from the six little girls and two from Jimmy-Boy and Aunt Sara. They were lovely, and there were some for Jimmy-Boy, but they did not please the children nearly as much as a letter that came a week later.

It was from the hospital superintendent and said: "I wish you could have seen my dear little sick girls smile when they saw their pretty valentines. They looked at them all day and slept with them under their pillows at night. One tiny girl kept hers in her hand. They all send a big ‘Thank you’ to Millicent and Jimmy-Boy."

"Next year we'll begin sooner and make forty," Millicent decided; "it's lots more fun than getting them, isn't it, Jimmy-Boy?"  ~ Marion Mallette Thornton

 

"Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own."  ~ Robert Heinlein

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Love of a Family!

It is late, and for some reason I am really tired so... I will leave this sweet quote with you.
Plus, a reminder that Valentine's Day is tomorrow, don't forget to Share The LOVE!

Don’t write your name on sand, waves will wash it away.
Don’t write your name in sky, wind may blow it away.

Write your name in hearts of people you come in touch with.
That’s where it will stay.

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"A happy family is but an earlier heaven."
-- John Bowring

"Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family: Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one."
-- Jane Howard

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Communication!

Tonight was Jeff and I's went to our second marriage class. The topic was about communication and how we as women and men are different in that area. The teacher tells a story of his Grandfather and Grandmother. The story took place at their 50th wedding anniversary and like always people asked them the traditional question...What does it take to make a good marriage? They gave some of the traditional answers but then jokingly someone asked ...What regrets do you have?  His grandfather smiled and turned to his wife and said " I wished that you could have made toast without burning it?" " What do you mean, you like it burnt? " His reply " No, I don't I never liked it burnt, why do  you say that?" Then she replied back and said  "because when we were first married, I accidentally burnt the toast and I was worried about it, but...you ate it and acted like you liked it! "

The point and moral of the story was ...how many years has something bothered us that our companion did but we just bottled it up and tried to stick it out?  Our challenge this week was to look carefully at our marriage and see if there is anything that really is bothering us, that we haven't discussed ( in a nice and calm manner, being respectful of your companion ). We need to learn to communicate!

Women typically need to use more words that men, typically our words mean different things such as...

5 mins...to a man that usually means 5 minutes  but to a woman usually it means whenever I get ready or finished with what I am doing.

Nothing...When  a man says nothing, he literally means nothing, when you ask a woman what is wrong and she says nothing, you usually know you are in trouble :)

Not all of these apply of course to each one of us but the point was that we need to accept our differences and validate the other person. Everyone needs and wants to be accepted and validated. If we could figure this out in our marriages, we would be so much happier!

It was a great class and once again a great reminder that marriage takes a lot of DAILY work and communication and respect! It also was good once again to remember that men and women are different and that is ok!!!!

 

"My husband and I have never considered divorce... murder sometimes, but never divorce." ~Joyce Brothers  :)

"The most common mistake couples make while trying to resolve conflicts is to respond before they have the full picture. This inevitably leads to arguments. When people respond too quickly, they often respond to the wrong issue. Listening helps us focus on the heart of the conflict. When we listen, understand, and respect each other’s ideas, we can then find a solution in which both of us are winners." (Dr Gary Chapman, from the article, “Solving Conflicts Without Arguing, featured in the Summer 2007 issue of Marriage Partnership Magazine)

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Doing what's right no matter what!

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day about Motherhood and how hard it is sometimes to know what the right decisions are for your children. It made me think of when my kids were little, not real little but little compared to now. They would often come home and ask if they could go over to a friend's house to play the next day. I would always ask them about their friend, what they liked about them and what they were planning to do when they got together. Then I told them I would first need to go over and meet their Mother and get a feel for the spirit of the home, to see if I felt like it was a safe place for them. The same would go for a party that they have been invited to or so on. The kids would not always like the idea that I was going to call the Moms and go over there to visit, they didn't like that I was going to ask what movie they were going to show at the birthday party, or who all was going to be chaperoning.
But having come from the background of ABUSE, I knew that it was my job as their Mother to protect them at all times, that meant even making sure that situations were safe even before they got put into them. My friend said "Wasn't that a lot of work?" You beat it was, that is exactly what Motherhood is all about. Not to be paranoid, but we do live in a day and time that very dangerous and we need to do all that we can to protect our children.
I was so grateful for the prompting's of the Spirit, I am not sure how some Mother's raise their families without it? 
I pray each day that I can listen to the spirit, gut feelings, conscience or promptings ( however it is, that one acknowledge that feeling) but I know that everyone is born with that spirit or as it is called in the scriptures (Light of Christ ) within them. That has always made me realize that our Heavenly Father does really love us to give that spirit or light of Christ to each of us. As a Mother, that is exactly what I tried to remind my children, they had to learn to not only to recognize it... but listen to it and obey it. This is like having our own compass, built in within us. There are many things that Mother's need to teach their children before they go out into the world and for me this was top on my list.
I have always tried to share with my kids when I have felt those promptings and what the result was, when I did and did not listen to them. Many times the decisions I had to make were not always popular and it was hard to stick to my guns and do what I knew to be right when others disagreed but ...welcome to Motherhood, that is what it is all about, making the tough choices. We do it because we know it is right, we do it because it protects our kids, we do it because we love them and we do it because we love the Lord and know that He would never leave us astray.
So my conversation to this sweet young Mother ended with me sharing all these things that have been near and dear to my heart. I also shared with her, even though  Motherhood is really the hardest job in the world, that it is also the most rewarding. 
It is important to look into the eyes of our children and grandchildren,and realize they are are worth any tough decisions we have to make, protecting and teaching them is our responsibility and honor, for each one of them is  truly worth it! 

"A child has the right to feel that in his home he has a place of refuge, a place of protection from the dangers and evils of the outside world." ~ David O. McKay

"As parenting declines, the need for policing increases. There will always be a shortage of police if there is a shortage of effective parents! Likewise, there will not be enough prisons if there are not enough good homes."
--Neal A. Maxwell, "Take Especial Care of Your Family," Ensign, May 1994,

"It's never too late to have a happy childhood."  ~Berke Breathed

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Enjoy the Journey!

It was a great day today. I still have my sister-in-law here and we went to the Quilt Shop for me to teach my class. We had a full house, it was really fun. I just love meeting all those incredible ladies. Shirley helped...she was like my Vanna White, sure wished she lived closer so we could do that more often. After work, I stopped by to see a dear friend who just had a knee replacement, I was shocked to see how good she looked. She is still in a lot of pain, but she is a trooper.

Then we got a surprise visit, from one of our friends from back in West Virginia. We haven't seen him in almost 20 years, he still looked great and was as fun as ever. It was nice to see photos of his family and catch up on each others family. Like I have said many times, a true friend is one you can pick up right where you started from the last time you saw each other. It had been 20 years, and you never would have known that if you listened to our conversations tonight over dinner. I feel very grateful that he would take time out of his busy schedule to look us up! What a treat.
Well, it is late and I am beyond worn out...busy days do that to me, but I am not complaining. I am so much better than I was this time last year!
So good night dear friends and like the poem below says, life is a journey and we truly are suppose to ENJOY it, I hope we are doing just that?

"Life is not a race-but indeed a journey. Be honest. Work hard. Be choosy. Say "thank you", "I love you", and "great job" to someone each day. Go to church, take time for prayer. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh. Let your handshake mean more than pen and paper. Love you life and what you've been given, it is not accidental-search for your purpose and do it as best you can. Dreaming does matter. It allows you to become that which you inspire to. Laugh often. Appreciate the little things in life and enjoy them. Some of the best things really are free. Do not worry, less wrinkles are more becoming. Forgive, it frees the soul. Take time for yourself-plan for longevity. Recognize the special people you've been blessed to know. Live for today, enjoy the moment."

"The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it." ~ Anonymous

"Life is a grindstone. Whether it grinds us down or polishes us up depends on us."  ~ Thomas L. Holdcroft

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Do I hold myself back?

Have you ever felt sometimes that the only thing that holds you back is yourself? I had an experience like that today. I was offered a great opportunity, and all I could think about was about my inadequacies and limitations.  But then as I talked to my family about this privilege, they were excited for me and complimented me on strengths and no one mentioned any of my limitations. I realized then, that I am the only one holding myself back. Wow, even at the ripe age of 51...I have a lot to learn!  Good night dear friends!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
You are the guy who'll decide where to go.
~ Dr. Suess

"The best way to gain self-confidence is to do what you are afraid to do."  ~Author Unknown

"It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not."  ~Author Unknown

"Whether you think you can or think you can't - you are right."  ~Henry Ford

Monday, February 7, 2011

Just like a sister!

Today my sister-in-law Shirley flew in town, to spend a week we me and my family. We are very close, I actually think we are probably as close as real sisters, ( of course I don't know if that is true, since I only had brothers ) I am just guessing. We try to get together, a couple of times if not more throughout the year. It is like we just can't make it, if we don't have some time scheduled in the future to get together. She and I were room mates during our college and Single years.  I think I have mentioned this story before. I got to thinking if I could hook her up with my brother and they fell in love, then I could have her as my friend and sister forever. That really sounded like a great plan to me and so that is exactly what I did...hooked them up, ( of course they had some say so in this whole thing ). And I have had, my best friend as my sister-in-law all these years.

We laugh and carry on so much each time that we are together, that I am sure it is healthy for us! Laughter is the best medicine they say. Trust me, we hardly ever stop laughing. I love having her here, what a treat! We are just going to play the whole week...doesn't that sound fun? I so many times get caught up with all the THINGS that I have to do in life, that I forget to have fun. So this was a really big deal to schedule this week together! 
We are both from West Virginia, and when we get together... our accents seem to get much stronger. It makes our kids laugh to hear us talk and joke around together. So not only are we having fun but we are entertaining, that is a good combination.

Just realized how thankful I am to have her in my life, and the bonus is I get to be close to her children and grandchildren too!  Gotta get to bed, lots of things to do tomorrow, night dear friends!

"Missing someone gets easier every day because even though it's one day further from the last time you saw each other, it's one day closer to the next time you will."

"A sister-in-law is a forever friend." ~ Lynn Woodard

Motherhood isn't as easy as one would imagine!

   I have a few friends who are expecting babies. For some of them it is their first baby, and for others, their 2nd, 3rd and 4th. As I was talking to another friend of mine who is a young Mom, I remembered having some of the same feelings that she was having. She and a friend had disagreed on each other's parenting style, that happens...it isn't an easy thing, but it really does happen. The trick is to save the friendship and yet continue to respect each others differences. Too often is it easier to say ... "my way is the right way ", well it is the right way for you and your child,but maybe not for another Mother and hers. And the truth is ...we tend to spend our time around those who have similar parenting styles as we do. That is where we are more comfortable.
   But I think we need to remember that we are all in this together, we are all Mothers, we of all people, need to respect our differences and focus on our strengths.       Motherhood is hard. It is vital for each Mom, to realize that she does not have to raise her baby on her own. She and her husband, can and should ask for counsel from the Lord. You are the only ones that will receive inspiration, on how to raise your child.  Even though we are all different, we Mothers really should stick together, you know ...safety in numbers!
 
   I loved this quote about Motherhood, and how much help we can truly get if we just ask for it. The world is getting tougher out there for our kids to grow up in, it is vital that we help our children, we need to nurture them and help them develop great faith. Then they will be better prepared to handle the world that they are to grow up in.
Good night dear friends, from a Mother who has been there...done that! ( and usually the hard way! )

“When you have come to the Lord in meekness and lowliness of heart and, as one mother said, “pounded on the doors of heaven to ask for, to plead for, to demand guidance and wisdom and help for this wondrous task,” that door is thrown open to provide you the influence and the help of all eternity. Claim the promises of the Savior of the world. Ask for the healing balm of the Atonement for whatever may be troubling you or your children. Know that in faith things will be made right in spite of you, or more correctly, because of you.

You can’t possibly do this alone, but you do have help. The Master of Heaven and Earth is there to bless you—He who resolutely goes after the lost sheep, sweeps thoroughly to find the lost coin, waits everlastingly for the return of the prodigal son. Yours is the work of salvation, and therefore you will be magnified, compensated, made more than you are and better than you have ever been as you try to make honest effort, however feeble you may sometimes feel that to be.” Jeffrey R. Holland, “‘Because She Is a Mother’,” Ensign, May 1997

Friday, February 4, 2011

Double Blessing Day!

  Well, I am worn out but all for good reasons. Today was my day to teach at the Quilt Shop. We had a great turnout and a whole lot of fun. You know, I probably have said this before but I am sorta like Superman...(stay with me on this) he gets his energy from the sun, and I get my energy from being with people! I just love making new friends and reconnecting with old ones, it doesn't get much better than that!  It is always a treat to go and show all the ladies a new project, something that is quick and easy, something that they can go right home and make. It is a highlight of my month. I get to teach the same class again this coming Weds. so I am looking for it. The opportunity to be able to teach is quite a blessing in my life, especially when you think how I have spent most of my time the last couple of years. Most of it was... going in and out of the hospital, Doctor's office, Physical Therapy appointments or home resting and trying to heal ...yes, it is nice to get out and be with others! And what better place to meet than in a Quilt Shop?  :)

Rosette 2

   "The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul. No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before."Everyone can create. You don't need money, position, or influence in order to create something of substance or beauty."Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty."  ~Dieter F. Uchtdorf

  The next blessing I had today actually happened tonight, Jeff and I went with some friends of ours, to a class on STRENGTHENING YOUR MARRIAGE. The teacher was amazing, and it really was very informative too. I think one of the most important things I learned tonight was...We need to always be willing to keep up the maintenance on our marriages, just like anything else we have our cars, our homes and ext. it is important to keep them up and maintain them, but how often we forget to do that with our marriages. It  was the little things that made us fall in love in the first place, and yet it seems like the little things are the ones that get put on the back burner and forgotten about or neglected, throughout the years. Marriage takes work and weekly connections, to keep it healthy and running. We learned it is important to always take the time to make our marriages not only work, and not only survive... but THRIVE and be something that brings us great JOY!

  The teacher challenged us to do two things this week as our homework...

1. To start having regular and weekly date nights ( just time alone, focusing on each other, and tuning out the rest of the world for that time period).

2. To sit down and honestly ask each other these two questions ...WHAT DO I DO WELL? and WHAT CAN I DO BETTER?  Remembering to be nice and honest, because he is going to ask  you the same questions next! 
His point was we need to trust our companions and realize that what they tell us is important. We need to do all that we can do to make our marriages the best that they can be.

There was a whole lot more but I will share that another time, but for today...I feel grateful for my double blessings!

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."  ~ George Bernard Shaw

"There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved." George Sands

"Marriage, ultimately, is the practice of becoming passionate friends." Harville Hendrix

Thursday, February 3, 2011

I made it !

   As you can see, the MRI machine below is the one that you have to go all the way inside the tube to take photos for a check up, to make sure I don't have cancer again. My last experience wasn't very good and it too way too long, plus a few other things that caused me to almost lose it when I was inside there. Most people like I mentioned before, take medication to make them relaxed enough to be able to handle going in there. Since I don't handle medicine well, I just have to go to my Happy Place. 
  I had a dream last night that while I was in the machine, the electricity went off and then the fire alarm went off and everyone left the building, and I was stuck in there and couldn't get out. I am not even sure you could wiggle yourself out of there so.... needlesstosay, I was praying hard, that I could reach my Happy Place and stay there until we were done today.
  The technician I had today was a man, that is a bit embarrassing but he was great, very kind, compassionate and sympathetic, I found after talking to him that he too was a Cancer Survivor...so he did understand the anxiety that I was having. But all in all I did it today, and hopefully when they get the results back in a couple of days, there will be nothing to report! Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers, it really is a bit tougher to do than one would think.
  They were an hour late getting me into my appointment, there was a patient in there who had to have more imaging, I personally know that isn't a good thing. I saw her face when she came out, she looked scared to death. I remember being in her shoes just two short years ago. You go in for a routine exam and then it ends up when they need to do one more image and then another couple of mammogram's and then you need to come back and do some biopsies...yuck, those were scary days. When I  passed the lady in the dressing room, I just said a little prayer for her. She probably had to have a million thoughts going through her head, that kind of news is hard to take. I just wanted to give her a hug and tell her that I would pray for her. But I didn't bother her, I just said a silent prayer. Cancer...it is a life altering experience!

  Good night dear friends...thank you again!

alg_mri_machine

"There is much in the world to make us afraid.  There is much more in our faith to make us unafraid."  ~Frederick W. Cropp

"He has not learned the lesson of life who does not every day surmount a fear."  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Fear is static that prevents me from hearing myself."  ~Samuel Butler

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Going to my Happy Place!

   It is just something we have always said to the kids, when something seems to hard for them to handle...like a Dental appointment, we tell them to just go to their Happy Place. I know that is much easier said than done, but there are times in our lives that we have to do that. For me it is an imaginary place, where I can get my head wrapped around whatever big task it is in front of me. I know where my real Happy Place is ... my home ( especially my sewing room ) but the Happy Place in my head takes quite a bit of effort to get there.
   I guess that really is what life is all about isn't it? Dentist's appointments, Doctor's appointment, waiting for lab results, anticipating a child leaving home, the worry of unemployment and on and on. I believe that everyone at one time in their life has to learn to go to their Happy Place. And for some of us ( lucky ) ones, we have to go there sometimes even once a day!.
   It really is a matter of faith for me. I know that I have to do something that is hard, that I really don't want to do, but it must be done. In some situations like I mentioned before, they can give you drugs to make you calm down or have the feeling of "whatever". I on the other hand am allergic to many of the drugs and so I don't have that luxury...I just have to go to my Happy Place!
   So I will take a deep breath, remember all the things I have accomplished before (that I never thought I could),and just close my eyes and get to my Happy Place as soon as possible. I do think this is Mind over Matter and for me...it takes a lot of FAITH and PRACTICE!

"If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it."  ~Mary Engelbreit

"Every thought is a seed.  If you plant crab apples, don't count on harvesting Golden Delicious."  ~Bill Meyer

"The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes."  ~William James

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Life's little accomplishments

Today was a good day, I was able to go back to Physical Therapy, and although some of things she did aren't very comfortable, I know in the long run it will be better for me. So even though I am hurting and feeling pretty worn out today, the sun was shining and I was able to be out and about for a while...and I am thankful for that!

I was also able to see my granddaughters for a little bit, drop off some new projects at the Quilt shop for my class this Friday, mailed some Valentine packages out, and got to teach a class for church, with some darling girls. I also made a new friend today, plus got to visit a dear friend who just came home from the hospital so....even though I didn't really accomplish anything big, it did seem like a lot of little things, were accomplishments today.

So I would give my day today... a thumbs up!  Now I am going to try and head to bed early.

I hope dear friends, you had a wonderful day too!


"I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble."   ~Helen Keller

"Great things are done by a series of small things brought together."  ~ Vincent Van Gogh