Be nice to yourself!

I liked this quote, it is a great one for me to remember...because I sometimes really pick on myself. Such a simple thing... but yet when you are in the world sometimes, it seems like everything is telling you that you are not enough. But deep down I know I am. Just need to remember that more often.

One way of helping me with my thoughts, is going to church on Sundays. I love the Sabbath. I love that it is a different day than any of the other days of the week. I love that it is a day of rest, mostly from our labors but...it is a day of rest and recharging my spiritual battery. How grateful I am that our Heavenly Father set one day aside for us to not only honor Him, but to remember Him and to learn how to be more like Him and His Son Jesus Christ. I love the scriptures... and in them so often I find the peace and joy, that I simply can't find any other place. So I am thankful today to live in America and where we have religious freedoms! Yes, I feel full of gratitude today! I am truly blessed!
Good night dear friends!

Aqua Mandie and I are back together again!

My back has seemed to been  hurting a lot, after my trip. It was a great trip but I did sit and walk and do things more, that were different than my normal every day routine. I think the  3 hour time difference is taking a toll on me too. Woke up at 4:00 this morning hurting and then just wrestled with my pillows and bedding for the next 3 hours....trying to get comfortable. By 7:00 am I had had enough and decided to just get up. Still my back is hurting, actually I was hurting all over.
Today of course was going to be Lauren and I's first day back at the pool since my trip, although I did swim while I was in Hawaii). Didn't feel like I should go ( or I should say I didn't want to go feeling so bad ) but still I felt like we needed to start sometime, so off we went, late but we went.
So making use of the time we had we took right off, we did a 1/4 of a mile today, I know that isn't much but it felt like a beginning. It has been almost 10 years or more since I swam a mile a day, wow... a lot has changed since then with my body and my stamina. Oh well, just decided to put on Aqua Mandie ( my swim prosthetic ) and  go swimming today, it is something I need to do and the only exercise that doesn't hurt my body, so I need to just do it. Sooooo glad we did, even though I was still hurting, it felt good to get some exercise. I forgot how tired you get from swimming throughout the day until you build up your strength and lung capacity.
I did swim in Hawaii at the club we were staying at, but I ended up not being able to wear the new swimsuit that I got ( for my B-day and especially for this trip ) because Aqua Mandie kept moving around too much when I swam and it was a bit obvious that something didn't look right. So I used my old swimsuit which I didn't feel as comfortable and normal in, and that played a bit with my mind and thoughts.
I have struggled my whole life with liking what I see in the mirror. Having had a mastectomy has been a constant struggle to just be OK with what I now see in the mirror. Don't get me wrong, most of the days I do fine,  and even can joke about it. But in Hawaii around so many people with both bodies ( as my granddaughter calls it ), I had a hard time not feeling sorry for myself or even feeling like I was enough. It seemed like everyone had a normal body but me. So you can see that sometimes a situation that you weren't even worried about ...can trigger destructive thoughts. I know what they are, I know what they feel like and yes...I am working on my thoughts and self esteem ....yet once again.
 What is so dangerous about feeling this way? Well, it is dangerous in lots of ways actually, it seems to taint all of your other thoughts, and pretty soon your whole perspective is out of whack.
I only mention this, not to have you feel sorry for me, but to share with you things that maybe others have experienced too and if you haven't, then ways to help you avoid these situations in the future.
I am working on it, I am tired and hurting anyway, and so that too takes a toll on your perspective, seems like it will feel like this forever.
So where do I go from here? Back to the basics, get enough sleep, eat right, exercise each day, read my scriptures and other uplifting books, be a keeper of my thoughts, pay attention to the thoughts that come in ( almost without me knowing ), have happy thoughts ready to replace them. Then I get down on my knees everyday and say thanks for the body I do have left, thanks for the health I have and on and on. Gratitude is a great defense to bad thoughts and hard days, and last but not least....Serve someone else, that makes a huge difference on how you see your life, when you look or share the struggles of others.
Sounds like I have done this before ...right? Oh yes, and I am pretty sure that it is something I will have to continue to work on for my whole life. That's ok, at least I know what to do.
Good night dear friends, hope this true confession has helped someone?  



                                                                                                                                                                    

What do you think of yourself?

 My daughter sent me this you tube video about how women see themselves. It was a very eye opening experience to watch. So often we don't see ourselves ...half as pretty or wonderful as others see us. Does being that critical about ourselves hurt us...it certainly does. Knowing who you are can help that feeling of inner beauty, and also not trying to compare ourselves to others in the world. Yes, after watching this...I realized that I still have a ways to go in this area!
Watch it...you will be enlightened...to say the least!
here:
Good night dear friends!

Learning to Appreciate Yourself

I found these quotes the other day, and realized I need to remember them for myself more often!

Hope  you enjoy the reminder too! Good night dear friends

Do you think highly of yourself? If not, now is the time to raise your self-esteem and self-worth.

  Remember, you are a beautiful person in your own unique way. And you are valuable, worthy and lovable.

I Highly Value Myself

"If you really put a small value upon yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price." 

-Author Unknown

  I Am My Own Best Friend

"We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies."

-Roderick Thorp

  I Believe in My Dreams

"Don't let anyone steal your dream. It's your dream, not theirs."

-Dan Zadra

  I Chart My Own Life Course

"I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship."

-Louisa May Alcott

I Don’t Let Others Bring Me Down

"Other people's opinion of you does not have to become your reality."

-Les Brown

  I Recognize the Jewel Within

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

  I Am Brilliant and Fabulous

"It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?"

-Marianne Williamson

   I Enjoy The Journey of Life

"Don't let life discourage you; everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was."

- Richard L. Evans

  Treat Myself Well and Others Do Too

"The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others."

-Sonya Friedman

  I No Longer Judge Myself

"It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes."

-Sally Field

True Beauty

I read this article the other day called Beauty Redefined, here are some of the points that the article mentions…

True beauty, would we recognize it if we saw it? The truth is what the media puts out as popular and real beauty isn’t what very many of us look like. One of the problems is the images of women in the media have usually been digitally manipulated so  why do we compare ourselves to that?

Where’s the ME in Media?…The average American spends 4.5  hours every day watching television and another 3.5 hours online, viewing  hundreds of advertisements in the process. With so much exposure to the positively portrayed  “normal” woman, it’s no wonder real people are feeling painful effects.  This kind of exposure of such a narrow image of women that it has shown to contribute to painfully low self-esteem, a preoccupation with appearance, and full-fledged eating disorders.

According to recent studies, half of all 9-12 year old girls wish they were thinner, and 35 percent of 6-12 year old girls have been on a least one diet.

More than half of adult women surveyed claim their bodies “disgust” them and 90 percent of women are dissatisfied with their appearance.

It is important to train ourselves to ask and answer pivotal questions, such as the following, about the media we’re exposed to on a regular basis”

1…Who is the advertising in this these pages or on this screen? ( Look for ads, commercials, and product placement that may affect the media content.)

2…Do I feel better or worse about myself after viewing this media?

3…Is the media I consume promoting real health or unattainable ideals that focus solely  on appearance?

4…How are women presented in our media choices? Are they valued for their talents and personality? Do they look like me or the women in my life?

5…Are my health and weight-loss goals based on concrete measures of fitness or wellness, or are they motivated by a desire to look a certain way or fit into a certain size?

By acknowledging that very few girls and women feel comfortable in their bodies, we can begin to realize it is the standard that needs changing –not us!  ~ Lexie Kite and Lindsay Kite 2011

I thought this article was excellent! We really do need to recognize and reject  the negative ideas that the media is putting out there about our bodies.

I for one, have to work on this daily and it is something that I struggle with. I don’t really think mine is because of the media as much as some, but still the struggle to not appreciate what I have is there and so I need to make sure that negativity stops. I need to remember… to just take the best care I can of my body.
  I hope it made you stop and think as it did me? Good night dear friends!
(P.S. the young woman in this post is a dear friend of ours. It’s her birthday today too! She is a great example of what we are talking about tonight…she has TRUE BEAUTY actually- inside and out! )

 

“The way we think about our bodies has a strong correlation to how we treat our bodies”

“When we see that the unrealistic body types  throughout the media don’t exist in real life. We can start to recognize and redefine real beauty and health for ourselves!” 

We are all the same!

When the kids were little, they loved the Shel Silverstein books that we read to them. The illustrations were a bit funky, but still they liked them. Tonight I will share one of the poems he wrote that I really like. It  reminds us of our worth, and no matter what we look like or our financial situation is...we are all the same worth and value to God! What a great reminder!

P.S.  I almost forgot, my granddaughter is doing much better, and so thanks to all of you for your prayers and calls. We will get the results of all the tests tonight or tomorrow hopefully. Gee, it is hard to watch these little ones be sick! Good night!

No difference

Small as a peanut,
Big as a giant,
We're all the same size
When we turn off the light.
Rich as a sultan,
Poor as a mite,
We're all worth the same
When we turn off the light.
Red, black or orange,
Yellow or white,
We all look the same
When we turn off the light.
So maybe the way
To make everything right
Is for God to just reach out
And turn off the light!

"It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes."  ~ Sally Field

"The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others."   ~ Dr. Sonya Friedman

Attitude

All my life I have admired people who really like themselves. They seem to be comfortable in their own skin and they like their body and carry themselves with a since of pride. Not in a conceited way, but in a confident and graceful way. I on the other hand, have never been one of those people. I have struggled for years with my self-esteem. I am so critical of myself, but would never judge others with the same critical eye.

We have been blessed to have our son and daughter-in-law, live with us for a few months...while they were doing their internships. My sweet daughter-in-law is ... one of those people who is comfortable with who she is. I am not saying that she never feels unsure about herself, (I think everyone does from time to time ) but mostly she is happy and has confidence. I admire that and need to be more like that. For some reason I tend to look at all the things that are wrong with me and it is a rare moment when I look into the mirror and like what I see.

Today Krystal and I were talking and she was telling me a certain fashion of clothes that I would look good in. I laughed and commented to her that I could never wear this or that. She talked about dresses and I told her I hadn't worn a dress in 15 years, they just don't make them for my shape. From that minute on, she was on a mission. She told me that we needed to go to the stores today and she would prove to me that I can wear different fashions. So we just all of a sudden made the decision (she is quite persuasive) and left. Our first stop was Macy. I really don't even go into Macy, because I have never been able to afford their clothes. But we went in and just decided to try a few things on. I have to admit ... I was amazed at how nice some of those outfits looked on me. I would have never tried some of those on, you know how you some times get stuck in the same fashion rut? She had me try on all sorts of styles and colors...it was so fun! She made me feel like a million bucks, she just kept telling me how nice this or that looked. It was a real treat and something that I needed today.

The down side is that we just were able to put it on hold and had to walk away and just think about it. I am not sure what I have to think, but they were beautiful clothes, and we had a wonderful time.

I have always had trouble with shopping. I don't like to spend money, I won't go in debt for it and most of the time, I don't feel like I would look good in it anyway. I have struggled even more with this since my mastectomy. I am always wondering if this or that neck line, shows the caved in part up near my collar bone from my surgery? But today when I was sitting in the dressing room waiting for Krystal to bring in some more clothes, I looked deep into the mirror at myself and thought..."Lynn, most people wouldn't even notice you had a mastectomy", "You need to love yourself more, you need to be comfortable with who you are and remember to appreciate that even though you have had cancer twice, a mastectomy and every other disease known to man...that you are still alive." "You need to be grateful for your body." "You need to be more accepting of  yourself!"

So it was a fun and insightful evening, thank you Krystal for helping me come out of my comfort zone, out of my old fashion habits and at least TRY something new! Thanks also for reminding me that my attitude about myself is very contagious to my family and those I associate with each day! I will try and do better and yes I did look nice in some of those clothes! I am still trying to think what I could sale to get them!  :)

"YOU CAN EXPLORE THE UNIVERSE LOOKING FOR SOMEBODY WHO IS MORE DESERVING OF YOUR LOVE AND AFFECTION THAN YOU ARE YOURSELF, AND YOU WILL NOT FIND THAT PERSON ANYWHERE!"

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, gifted ability, or skill. It will make or break a company, a church, a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace from that day. We cannot change our past, we cannot change the fact that people will act in certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing that we can do is play on the one string that we have and this string is, Attitude. I am convinced that life is ten percent what happens to me and ninety percent how I react to it. And so it is with you....We are in charge of our Attitudes.
-- Charles Swindoll

Our infinite worth!

I have always loved this story of the old violin and how it reminds us of our infinite worth. Lauren at school sent this photo that she took yesterday and I knew this was the perfect story to put with it. Thank you to the lovely musician that shared her talent. I hope after reading this story that each of us will remember to hold our head up a little higher and be proud of who we are!

The Touch of the Master's Hand

"Twas battered and scared, and the auctioneer
Thought it scarcely worth his while
To waste much time on the old violin,
But he held it up with a smile.
"What am I bidden, good folks," he cried,
"Who'll start bidding for me?
A dollar, a dollar - now who"ll make it two _
Two dollars, and who"ll make it three?

"Three dollars once, three dollars twice,
Going for three". . . but no!
From the room far back a gray-haired man
Came forward and picked up the bow;
Then wiping the dust from the old violin,
And tightening up the strings,
He played a melody,pure and sweet,
As sweet as an angel sings.

The music ceased and the auctioneer
With a voice that was quiet and low,
Said: "What am I bidden for the old violin?"
And he held it up with the bow;
"A thousand dollars - and who'll make it two?
Two thousand - and who'll make it three?
Three thousand once, three thousand twice
And going - and gone," said he.

The people cheered, but some of them cried,
"We do not quite understand -
What changed its worth?" The man replied:
"The touch of the masters hand."
And many a man with life out of tune,
And battered and torn with sin,
Is auctioned cheap to a thoughtless crowd.
Much like the old violin.

A "mess of pottage," a glass of wine,
A game and he travels on,
He's going once, and going twice -
He's going - and almost gone!
But the MASTER comes, and the foolish crowd,
Never can quite understand,
The worth of a soul, and the change that's wrought
By the touch of the MASTER'S hand.

~Myra B. Welch

"It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere."  ~Agnes Repplier

"What we do flows from who we are."  ~Paul Vitale