Wednesday, November 30, 2011

What I wished I had known when I was sixteen!

I have shared with many of you my one of my favorite authors….Jason F. Wright. Today I read his weekly article and it struck a cord in me. You might ask why? Because when I was sixteen years old, I was engaged to be married, it wasn’t a prearranged marriage but….close.Smile  I know I was in the wrong culture for that, but still the pressure was on. I had known this guy for a couple of years and he was a very nice person.  He was 5 years older than me and had a good family. The problem was…I was too young! I still had a year of High School left. My Mom and his Mom already had their dresses made, the Women’s Club had already been rented and the material was bought for my dress to be made. However one night when a friend of ours was starting to measure me to make my dress,  she began to ask me some really important questions. Ones that I really didn’t have the answer for, like where we were going to live, or what he was going to do for a living. She also reminded me that IF we didn’t completely get along now…chances are it won’t get any better. So after that conversation and staying up all night crying and praying, I broke off the engagement the next morning. It was actually easier to tell him than it was my Mom. She actually struggled hard for years about my decision. Still I knew that it was right and how grateful I am, that I had the courage to do that.

So when I read this article that Jason Wright wrote for his daughter who was turning 16 today… I was both happy and sad. I was happy to hear the love that he had for his daughter, and yet a bit sad because I never had much of a relationship at all with my Dad. Plus, it reminded me once again the importance of a Father in a girl’s life. How happy I am that my girls and granddaughters have that, it truly is a blessing!

As for what I wished I had known when I was 16, was almost everything that Jason said in his article. I might have added for me these things…

That sixteen years old, is way too young to get married.

That just because someone is family, doesn’t automatically mean they can be trusted (they have to earn that trust ).

That my opinion was important and that I deserved to be treated well.

That I could trust my gut feelings.

That I was an important person,  and that I had much to share with the world.

And most of all that if I would wait a few more years, I would find the man of my dreams, and that he would literally be my best friend, be trustworthy, be a great Dad for our kids and a man that served the Lord.


Had I known that at 16…I probably would have broken off the engagement sooner!

A good reminder of this is, the silver band that this young man  gave me as an engagement ring, is still in our family. I asked my girls to wear it as a daily reminder to…marry the right person, at the right time, for the right reason and at the right place! So if I could go back and thank that young man for not marring me…I would. I actually think he would feel the same way
How glad I am that my Heavenly Father and so many friends were watching over me as a 16 year (who was not in a good place in her life ).

If you get a minute…read his article, he is a great writer! (He wrote one of our favorite Christmas books called… THE CHRISTMAS JAR)

http://jasonfwright.com/column/what-I-wish-Id-known-when-I-turned-16.html

Good night dear friends!

'The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet."   ~ Robert Orben

"You were born an original. Don't die a copy."    ~ John Mason

“Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!”     ~Lydia M. Child

“Any man can be a father.  It takes someone special to be a dad.”     ~Author Unknown

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