Friday, October 30, 2009

Everything can't always be your way!

As a little girl I remember my mother telling my brothers and I often...that things can't always be or go our way. Of course we would continue to tell her why we thought our way was not just the best way, but the only way in our eyes. Now I am sorry to admit this, but I have said those very same words to my kids. Some times it does seem like... if only things could go just like we want them to, then life wouldn't be so hard. I was thinking about this today and laughed to myself if I really did live in world that everything happened the way I wanted it to.
For instance, my children still would be living at home and crawling around or I would be carrying them, because I wouldn't have wanted them to try walking and I certainly didn't want them to take that chance... if it meant they would have to fall down and get hurt. They still would be eating only baby food because I certainly wouldn't want to make them try and eat something if they didn't want to eat it, even though it was good for them. (they would probably be a bit under nourished too! Of course they would still be at home, because I wouldn't want to send them out into the world where kids can be mean and cruel and on and on...I think you get the picture!

Yes, I guess my mom was right, we can't have things like we always want it. And the truth of it is, that it probably wouldn't be good for us ...if we did. Life is all about learning, hurting, and growing. A lot of times that means that there might be some hard times involved. I have to admit that as a mom the hardest thing for me is to watch my kids struggle and or suffer. I just would almost rather have it happen to me than them, it is that hard to watch. But every day I realize that they are learning and that many of those lessons will be vital for their I can't take all the bad things away and I shouldn't take them away.

So what do we do (especially us mom's) when we see our kids or family members struggle? I believe that we continue to support, love and believe in them. We should always pray that they will have whatever it takes to handle the trials they are facing. I remember a year ago when I was waiting for the final information on the size and stage of my tumor, my first thought was "I am so glad this is happening to me and not to Jeff or one of my kids". Now, I understand that it doesn't always happen like that but as a mom, you would take the pain and struggles any day....if you could. Not that you should but....if you could.

When I read this quote the other day ...


it reminded me that we need not to wish our problems and struggles away, but pray about them and see what it is that we need to learn and grow from? Let us try to teach our children all the important things they will need in life. When they walk out that door each day or to leave for college or marriage, let's make sure that they have  packed with them... all that they are going to need to face the world. I hope we will all try to remember that more often and also take the time to support, love and comfort those of our loved ones that are going through times and situations that are hard to watch. Knowing that you will always be there for them is a great comfort. I should know ...that is exactly what so many of you have done for me throughout the years! Thank you for that!


"God allows us to experience the low points of our life in order to teach us lessons we could not learn in any other way. The way we learn those lessons is not to deny the feelings but to find the meanings underlying them"            ~ Stanley Lindquist


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