Then it is Winter!

I must be getting old, one reason is...I am taking forever to heal up from this past illness. I started counting my good days, but after 3 it went down hill a bit... so I decided not to count any more.The second reason I know I am getting older is because I understood, liked and related to this article below. Oh well, still grateful to be alive.
Good night dear friends!

You know, time has a way of moving quickly and catching you unaware of the passing years.  It seems just yesterday that I was young, just married and embarking on my new life with my mate. Yet in a way, it seems like eons ago, and I wonder where all the years went.  I know that I lived them all.  I have glimpses of how it was back then and of all my hopes and dreams.

But, here it is, the winter of my life and it catches me by surprise...How did it get here so fast?  Where did the years go and where did my youth go?   I remember well seeing older people through the years and thinking that those older people were years away from me and that winter was so far off that I could not fathom it or imagine fully what it would be like.

But, here it is...my  friends are retired and getting grey...they move slower and I see an older person now.  Some are in better and some worse shape than I am...but, I see the great change...Not like the ones that I remember who were young and vibrant...but, like me, their age is beginning to show and we are now those older folks that we used to see and never thought we'd be.

And so...now I enter into this new season of my life unprepared for all the aches and pains and the loss of strength and ability to go and do things that I wish I had done but never did!!  But, at least I know that though the winter has come, and I'm not sure how long it will last...this I know, that when it's over on this earth...it's not over.  A new adventure will begin!    Yes, I have regrets.  There are things I wish I hadn't done...things I should have done, but indeed, there are many things I'm happy to have done.  It's all in a lifetime.

So,  if you're not in your winter yet...let me remind you, that it will be here faster than you think. Whatever you would like to accomplish in your life, please do it quickly!   Don't put things off too long!!   Life goes by quickly.   Do what you can today, as you can never be sure whether this is your winter or not!   You have no promise that you will see all the seasons of your life...so, live for today and say all the things that you want your loved ones to remember...and hope that they appreciate and love you for all the things that you have done for them in all the years past!!

"Life" is a gift to you.  The way you live your life is your gift to those who come after.  Make it a fantastic one!    LIVE IT WELL!    ENJOY TODAY!    DO SOMETHING FUN!    BE HAPPY !    HAVE A GREAT DAY!    Remember "It is health  that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver."   BE PATIENT AND BE KIND!  LIVE HAPPY IN 2013!    LASTLY, CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING:    TODAY IS THE OLDEST YOU'VE EVER BEEN,    YET THE YOUNGEST YOU'LL EVER BE.   

SO - ENJOY THIS DAY WHILE IT LASTS.

~Your kids are becoming you......but your grandchildren are perfect!    ~Going out is good.. Coming home is better!    ~You forget names.... But it's OK because other people forgot they even knew you!!!    ~You realize you're never going to be really good at anything.... Especially golf.    ~The things you used to care to do, you no longer care to do, but you really do care that you don't care to do them anymore.    ~You sleep better on a lounge chair with the TV  blaring than in bed.  It's called "pre-sleep".

~You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch..    ~You tend to use more 4 letter words ... "what?"..."when?"... ???    ~Now that you can afford expensive jewelry, it's not safe to wear it anywhere.    ~You notice everything they sell in stores is "sleeveless"?!!!    ~What used to be freckles are now liver spots.    ~Everybody whispers.    ~You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet.... 2 of which you will never wear again.    ~~~But Old is good in some things:  Old Songs, Old movies, and best of all, OLD FRIENDS!!

Stay well, "OLD FRIEND!"

Day 3 and still counting!

Today is... day 3 of feeling good! It was also sunny and beautiful, plus some dear friends came over to help me take down my Christmas decorations. I love Christmas, but it's March and it does feel like it's time to finally take it down. I mean I actually care that it's been up too long. That only happened this week, so I am grateful. Not sure if I am going to be able to decorate for St. Patrick's Day this year but hopefully I can at least get my house back to normal and not looking like we just moved in.
I love this quote about Patience, that is something I started lacking after 5 weeks of being so sick. The last 4 weeks I felt like I might never get to see the outside world again, I would cry when Jeff left for work. I was turning into a basket case. The asthma was such a big deal, and maybe to give myself a break...not having enough oxygen could cause one to lose hope, among other things.
So whether it was the vitamin injections that I started taking, or the asthma medicine that started working... or my body finally decided to fight after 9 long weeks....I am just grateful. I pray that the lessons I learned from this, will be something that I will remember for a long time.
Thank you for your love, concern and prayers.
It made all the difference.
Good night dear friends!

Faith of a child!

Another great day, I actually went out and talked to the neighbors...they were so surprised to see me, I mean really surprised. It felt so good to be out in the fresh air, and Jeff helped me take the dead Christmas greenery off the porch and the wreaths off the front door. Now it looks like no one lives here at all!:)
Loved this story about the faith of a child. I remember many of these type experiences with my own kids.
Good night dear friends!

Lessons learned from a lost Lego

Will I ever learn?

Last February I wrote about my son’s experience losing a tiny part to a toy racecar. I told Kason then that the odds of finding the miniscule bit were about as slim as the piece itself – no bigger than his fingernail.

The faithful scavenger refused to give up and eventually he found it, I was humbled, and in the process I promised I would not doubt his faith next time and would also try to have more of my own.

“Next time” arrived last Sunday.

Both Kason and his younger brother have been Lego fans since the womb. That passion has reached new heights with the release of “The Lego Movie.” I never imagined that a 90-minute commercial could be so entertaining, but the entire Wright gang enjoyed it and the kids have been back to see it twice.

A week ago several of Kason’s Lego men stowed away on the drive to church. They are small pieces, the size of his thumb, and fit perfectly in his little suit pocket.

After church, he and a few other righteous hooligans waited for their parents to finish socializing outside in the small field next to the chapel. It was harmless fun, the kind of chasing and racing that’s written into the job description of every little boy.

Shortly after returning home, Kason discovered that his Lego men had all gone missing. Thankfully we live close to the church and we were able to return and form an all-hands-on-deck search party.

A dozen of us searched the grass and two were located surprisingly quickly, but the third, his favorite, was nowhere to be found. Eventually we called off the search and rescue and headed home.

Later, at some point during the early evening, Kason remembered the missing man had a small, glow-in-the-dark strip on its head. He suggested that if we went back after dark perhaps we would find it more easily. I answered with all the standard excuses from my dad textbook.

“I’m sorry bud, but it’s a school night.”

“I’m sorry kiddo, it’s really cooled off outside and it’s too cold for a wild goose chase.”

“Listen big guy, we’re not going to find it.”

Around 8 p.m., with the kids in their pajamas and their mother on the telephone in another room, he hit me again with his final plea. “I know we’ll find it, Dad.”

I’ll admit I saw a bit of myself in him. There he stood in his new Mario pajamas pleading for one more chance to prove his old man wrong.

I called very quietly into my kitchen, knowing his mother was still busy. “Honey, you still on the phone? Do you mind if we go back to the church to look one more time for Kason’s Lego man?”

Hearing no objections, and history will dispute whether she ever actually heard me, I loaded the boys in the car and we set off to hunt one more time for that which was destined never be seen again.

We started with our flashlights off, but quickly realized it was unlikely the little guy would have any glow left in his gut. The three of us took our flashlights and searched the field trying to find a toy the same size as the orphaned French fry at the bottom of a McDonald’s bag.

After fifteen minutes the sleeping sun and brisk breeze reminded us it was winter and my chattering teeth said it was time to offer condolences for the missing toy and pack it up.

I gave several warnings. “Three minutes, two minutes, one more minute and I’m going home, guys.”

With a final, “Wrap it up, boys,” I began walking to the car. I was reaching for the door when I heard an excited scream behind me. I turned around and in the dim spill of the parking lot light saw my 10-year-old with his arms stretched overhead.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I whispered to my self-doubt.

“I found it,” he yelled and his younger brother came running over to me to repeat the news, as if I hadn’t been paying attention.

I walked back to the spot where the successful adventurer still stood. He reenacted the moment of discovery and the act of pushing a leaf aside with his shoe and finding the missing man facedown in the dying winter grass.

Kason looked up at me and without the slightest sense of sarcasm said, “You totally have to write a column about this.”

I haven’t laughed that hard in months.

On the walk back to the car, the giddy boy explained how he’d prayed privately that afternoon that his prized toy would be found.

“Would you have been all right if you hadn’t found it?” I asked.

“Sure,” he said. His mother had already promised to find a replacement online and surely he wouldn’t have cried himself to sleep or doubted his belief in God had his tender prayer not been answered. He certainly had not staked his faith in him on some miracle.

He’d simply displayed childlike confidence that something lost might be found. He believed that faith coupled with effort would win the day.

He might be right; isn’t this how faith works?

If we’re ill, we pray to be well, but we also do everything we can to make ourselves better by caring for our body, taking proper medication and listening to what doctors are other experts say will help us heal.

Need to pass a test? Anxious about a certification exam? Worried about a job evaluation? When faced with these moments, we might pray and express faith that heaven will help us, but then we also study and do everything we can to meet God at the intersection of faith and works.

He didn’t have faith the toy would come to life, walk home and climb back into his Lego bucket. He knew his faith required sacrifice and effort and that even with his best work it might not be enough.

Don’t be mistaken – neither my son nor I believe this miracle deserves to be written up alongside the parting of the Red Sea, healing of the blind man or walking on water.

But for a 10-year-old who’s beginning to discover that he need not rely on dad’s faith forever, it’s an important building block in his spiritual foundation.

For me, it’s yet another reminder that I have a long way to go as an adult have the faith of the child.

Maybe I’ll go play with my kid’s Legos.

I found the story HERE:

What a great day!

Today I got up and felt better than I had in a LONG time, I tried to stay low and not over do anything. Still I was so excited, I felt like I had more energy and was excited about things again. I actually went downstairs for the first time in a long time, and worked on something in my Sewing Studio ( ok room, but studio does sound better don't you think ?).
Then the day got even better, my doorbell rang and when I went to get it ...there was a lady delivering flowers to my door. I smiled as she was walking away and said "thanks I probably should leave them on my porch, they look better than my dying Christmas greenery". She just smiled and said that she wondered if something had been wrong. We talked for a minute and then she left and I brought the flowers in. I was so surprised when I read the note it said..."Mom would be proud of you as a Mother and a Grandmother, Love your brothers " I couldn't believe it, how sweet for them to send me flowers, I know they had been worried about me...but to send flowers and have them to arrive on Mom's Birthday, was even more thoughtful. It made my day!
When I was 40 years old, my Mom passed away. I remember thinking that I was way to young to lose my Mom...who do you call when you have questions about raising your kids, or for an old family recipe and most important who would check on me when I am having a bad day or sick (and she would know that without anyone telling her)? I think most of all, I miss that she never got to see my kids grow up, she would have loved what a difference in the world they are making. And I wouldn't even mind if she would have stayed around long enough to meet my grandchildren...she would have loved them for sure. She loved being a Grandmother more than anything. I really do miss her!
So today was a great day and it ended up a surprise for Jeff too! Because I even made dinner...it was a shocker to him, but I know he was just happy to see me feeling better and having a least a couple of things go back to normal...so am I!
Good night dear friends, oh and here are my beautiful flowers!

If you can't beat them, join them!

Friday the Amy and the girls came over to spend the day. I was surprised that they didn't say much about Nana still having Winter/ Christmas decorations up. I know ...like me, we were  just glad that I was healthy enough to have them come visit and that they were cold and germ free  ( at least we hoped ). I still was worn out from the day but really I just sat around and played with Audrey, watched movies with the girls. Amy made lunch and when John came ... he made dinner. So still it wasn't really much to do but just sweeping the floors before and straightening things up a bit ( since I have been living like a man for the last 9 weeks ( nothing personal to all the men out there ), so I had to clean up some. Especially since Miss Audrey is crawling everywhere. She is like a little Hoover when it comes to picking things up off the floor ( and of course putting them in her mouth ).
What made me laugh on Friday was that a couple of weeks ago it was sunny and I just took the old greenery and berries off the deck and threw them over the banister onto the back yard. I had high hopes are going down later and putting them in the Yard Waste container, but that never happened.
So when Angie and Jenny went outside to play in their play house on the deck, they asked for tons of wet paper towels so they could clean it up. It had gotten quite dirty from the winter weather. Then I noticed they kept going down stairs and getting stuff. Yes, you guessed it...they went and picked up all that old greenery and berries and decorated their newly cleaned house. I guess since Nana's house still had Christmas us they thought... they could do the same to theirs! :)

I guess the old saying " If you can't beat them, then you mind as well join them" is appropriate.

So I made up some snacks and of course with their dinosaurs in hand, they had a lovely snack and tea party.

 

I just love seeing them, I have missed doing sleep overs and tea parties with them, since I have been sick for so long. They just seemed happy to be here, Christmas decorations and all! Oh how we wished Kai lived close enough to come join in on the fun!

 

At one point, I had to take a nap, so Amy took the girls to our park, this was Audrey's first time on a swing, she loved it. Look closely and you can see her little fangs that are coming in, still waiting on the front ones. It was a good day but more than I have done in a while.

 

So Saturday I was a bit more tired and my cough was back a little bit. I felt like I had gone backwards maybe a step or two. I was discouraged, it seems like anything really wipes me out. I stayed in my PJ's all day. Thankfully Jeff spent the day doing errands, what a trooper. I stayed by the fire and did some drawings. Then since my appetite is back, I made up a week menu. Tried a new soup for dinner and it was great, tried a new snack...high protein, low carbs...it was nasty. But at least I tried. So I went to bed trying to remember that this is going to be SLOW, very slow I guess!

Good night dear friends!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Protecting your Motherhood!

I loved this article written by a Mother of Three, called  When Satan Steals Your Motherhood! Read it, it is so true and such a good reminder to all Mothers out there!

 

 

 

It is there, and it creeps up like a silent killer. Maybe it is the wet underwear that you found floating in the hallway bathroom. Or the cat food that has been flung out on the floor like tiny marbles waiting to trip up a passer-by. Or the loud thumping and yelling and tantruming as if we live in some sort of primal age where roaring and beating your chest were the only way to get other’s attention.
And all of that madness and anger? It wasn’t the kids. It was me. The mother. The one who left a pair of Superman undies in a bathroom we rarely use for days, fed the cat without my glasses after someone else forgot, and the loud, obnoxious, downright scary human being I can be when I have just had more than I can handle.
That’s the kind of thing that happens when you allow satan to steal your motherhood.
No, it’s not the mistakes. It’s not the forgetfulness. It is what happens on the inside that no one else sees. And he knows just how to get to you.
He admires you, you know. But only when you yell at your kids, complain about tasks that need to be done regardless of how many people are in your home. He loves it when you wish you were the mom with the skinny jeans and tall boots and shiny hair with the perfectly groomed kids at the mall play area. You look at her and think you are subpar. Satan loves that.
Satan also loves it when you get scared because someone posted a random video online of how their 4-year-old can read, so you freak out that your 4-year-old is more interested in roaming outdoors and playing with bobby pins and giving them names, so you panic because books are the last thing on her mind. Satan is clapping now.
Satan also adores you when you get on the phone and ignore your kids, when you hide your true feelings and dreams and frustrations with your husband with a weak “I’m fine” and when you feel like this fun birthday party at the park for your children isn’t “the best” compared to someone else’s insanely expensive Pinterest celebration.
Satan wants you to fail. And to feel alone. And to feel inadequate to what Someone Else has called you to do.
Because I might as well have left the front door unlocked and allowed a thief to come right in my home yesterday. I mean, why not? I let Satan in. After all the fussing and nagging and utter bone tired exhaustion, I crawled into bed with my 3-year-old for a moment. Just to apologize.
“I am so sorry today was so rough.”
“I didn’t think it was rough. I thought it was fun!”
“Really? Which part was fun?”
“The part where we played on the couch like we were on a boat. Where we ‘fished’ with your belt as a fishing line, and used the couch pillows for life boats.”
Tears started rolling down my cheeks.
“Please pray for me. That I can be a better Mommy.”
“Oh, I did! Earlier today. When it was sunny. Right before we played the boat game.”
Today I’m locking the door tight to whatever evil enters my heart and home.
Today I am going to remember the One who gives life and knows I am a mess and loves me anyway.
I washed the undies. The cat took care of the food. That 4-year-old is now 6 and can read like a champ. But she still names random things. And it’s cool that my hair is “shiny” because it is unwashed and I can’t wear tall boots because they make me taller than the guy that loves me to the moon and back.
Roll those cars down a ramp, read one more princess story, forget how “busy” you think you are and what the world thinks you should accomplish in a 24-hour period and for heaven’s sake, log off of Pinterest.
Take your kids and an old, worn blanket, reheat that coffee and hold them tight and just rest at the feet of Jesus for a moment.
Today? It is going to be okay. Take back your motherhood. It is a gift. Listen to the life-giver, NOT the liar.
Christie is a mother of three, cop’s wife, and Junior Mint lover. She blogs at Letters From the Nest and is a columnist for her hometown newspaper, The LaFollette Press. Christie and her family reside in the Appalachian mountains of East Tennessee, where sweet tea is served at every meal and hospitality is second nature.

I found the letter HERE:

"There is no role in life more essential and more eternal than that of MOTHERHOOD!"
~M.Russell Ballard

 

Happy Tears!

Well, I left this morning to head to the Doctor's office to get another vitamin injection. Hoping that these are what is helping me get better little by little. After the injection, I had an appointment with my Doctor, to go over the results from my CT scan I had yesterday. I am telling you, once you have had cancer, these appointments are pretty stressful...to say the least. Before I headed to bed last night, I once again went over in my prayers, how grateful I have been for the last 3 healthy years and that if I had to battle cancer again, that somehow I would be given the strength to do so. Then this morning I woke up and studied my scriptures and said my prayers, and headed off to the Doctor's office, knowing I have done all I can do to prepare for whatever the results were.
 We went over the whole report and the sentence I remember the most was ..." No evidenced of recurrent disease"!!! Because going in there that is what they were looking for  "Metastatic disease ", which means cancer that is active and spreading somewhere in my body. I don't have cancer!!! How blessed I feel, I couldn't help but get in the car and let the happy tears come. I have to admit that after being sick for 9 weeks without seeing any improvement, I was worried too that maybe my cancer had come back. How thankful I feel.
Now I am still suppose to take it slow, not go out a lot and try not to catch any other germs while my body is getting stronger... but I thought that I should really get Jeff's shirts in the Dry Cleaners. I could open the door with my coat, so I don't have to touch it and all the germs on it. Then I just hand them the shirt and get the receipt. I love these people at that dry cleaners, they are a brother and sister and that are so nice. They don't speak much English, but their kindness anyone could understand. When I walked in the sister said to me" your husband say you have been very sick" I told her yes and that I am starting to feel better. She looked at me and I remember that we have been going there a long time and that they knew me when I was going through my last battle with cancer. I told her that we got test results back today and there is no cancer, we are grateful for that. She sighed and then smiled and reached out for my hand, then she covered her other hand on top of mine and said " So Happy!" and I knew she truly was.
What kindness... what sincerity, what a cherished friendship for someone who does a service for our family. This is what I have missed for the past 9 weeks, my friendships with others! How rich I feel from having soooo many dear friends, who are truly So Happy for me.
I felt your love, concern and prayers...I am grateful for each of you dear friends.

It's the little things!

Got up this morning and got ready to be at my CT Scan by 9:00. I had been fasting and so I brought some water and a protein bar in the car for afterwards. As soon as I checked in they gave me to containers of the CT Smooties, you know the one with the contrast in them. They asked if I would like Banana, Vanilla, Mocha or Berry, then she quickly told me that Berry was the worst. I still almost laugh out loud. Do you really think those girls sit back there on their breaks, and drink that stuff... just to tell us which one is the best or the worst? I think not but...who knows maybe that is in their job description. Either way they are disgusting and I just keep chugging it until it was gone, and then quickly put some gum in my mouth. My stomach still feels a bit yucky.
I thought as I was laying there getting the scan, how nervous going back into this medical arena makes me feel. I think those feelings are pretty normal once you have had cancer or any medical issues that are big. I wondered what they saw? Is there anything there that is keeping me from getting better? Is it cancer again? Well, all those crazy questions went racing through my head and the feelings that were racing through my heart were ..." can I do this again if it is cancer?" Is there something really bad wrong with me, that is keeping me from getting better and if so, can I handle what it is?"
As I went back in the dressing room, I heard another nurse talking to a lady about her mass that they found previously, and what this scan would show her doctor this time. I remember those conversations when I was first diagnosed with cancer. It is an unreal feeling, when they are just talking to you about something like that, as if it is just an every day conversation. Well, I know it is for them but not for the one who is receiving the news. I wanted to just hug the lady and tell her that she will be ok...but first of all I didn't know her, or her situation; but I just hated the fact that she was there all alone.
My results may be in tomorrow or Friday, we pray and hope for the best. I will go in tomorrow and get more of the vitamin IVs, since after the last one, I started to noticeably get better. For tonight, I will just look at this picture and smile. This is what my granddaughter Jenny does when she is eating or I should say playing with her food.
Life is good, I have much to be happy about. And I am grateful!
Good night dear friends!

A roller coaster life!

Well,it seems like some time life is like a roller coaster. I have for a few days tried to get ready for my PET scan today, only to have it cancelled this morning by the insurance company. I guess they want me to have other imaging first. So after preparing myself for 2 days, then everything changed...I realized that is what life is ...full of ups and downs. Now tomorrow at 9:00am I will have a chest, abdomen and pelvis CT scan. So stay tuned for more of my exciting life ! :)

Things I need to remember today!

I woke up a bit earlier than usual this morning, because I had to eat my breakfast by a certain time and then fast from then on ...until the scan. Since yesterday I was only allowed to eat Cheese, Meat or Eggs, that was a switch, I don't tend to eat a lot of any of those but... just for a couple of days I could do it. After breakfast I decided I should just go back to bed and kill some time before I have to leave. Then I realized that I probably should do something productive, instead of just trying to kill time. So I began my scripture study. Now that is something I usually do in the morning during or right after my breakfast, but today I took on a new type of reading...I was searching. Funny how you tend to search and ponder things more, when you are discouraged or scared. I have been both of those for quite some time since I have been sick.
As years past, I have found such comfort and hope in the scriptures that I am always sad when I forget to go there first. I try to figure it out myself, I look at only today, and how bad or sick I feel.  As I was reading and studying in other sources too, I found this wonderful quote " When our day -to -day challenges loom before us, it is natural to focus on the hear and now. But prophets have admonished us to remember the eternal perspective. Only then can we successfully navigate mortality." So true! I need to remember to look at the whole picture! Things look so much better that way. I was reading in the Old Testament in the book of Deuteronomy 11:18 where Moses admonished tangible objects such as Frontlets, to be worn on the people as a reminder of God's goodness. When I looked up the word "frontlets" in the Bible dictionary, it tells that they were scriptures and prophet's words written on strips of parchment and rolled up or put in tiny boxes and worn on their arms or foreheads. One would think for sure you would remember the words of God and the prophets, if you them strapped on your head, right between your eyes every day! :) Then in the book of Joshua 4:21-24 it talks about where the Lord directs Joshua ( who succeeded Moses) to have the people gather 12 stones and keep them with them. And when their children ask what the stones mean, then they could share with them, the miracles that God had given them in their lives. They would share their testimony of how mighty their God is.
I have to admit, I love the Old Testament, I love the stories and the symbols and things that they used to teach and remind themselves of the goodness of God.
When I served my mission years ago, I loved being able to share my testimony of the Love of God. In a world of so many troubles and concerns, it was great to tell the people who wanted to hear...that there is a purpose why we are here on earth. In a book titled Why Did This Happen to Me? by Ray Pritchard. He says: "Sometimes we will face things for which there is no earthly explanation. In those moments we need to erect a sign that reads, 'Quiet: God at Work.' Meanwhile, hold on, child of God. Keep believing. Don't quit. Don't give up. Let God do His work in you. The greatest tragedy is to miss what God wants to teach us through our troubles."
This sign is what I needed to have on my mirror the last few weeks.
 I know that my Heavenly Father loves me. I know that I have to have this scan today to see if there is Cancer in my body. I know that I can handle with His help, anything that comes my way. I pray it isn't Cancer... but then again, we need to know what we are up against, I need to get better... my body is responding slowly and sluggishly, we need to know why.
So I will go to this appointment today, I will drink that nasty shake that has the dye in it for the exam. I will wait as they pump more dye through a IV hooked up to a machine to push it through my whole body, and then next go through the radiation... and then we will wait and pray.
Thank you for your love, prayers and support. It truly means more to me than I can ever express adequately in words. The love of family and friends, is more powerful than one can hardly imagine. I love you, I appreciate you and I hope that I can be a good example to you, of the faith that I have. I have been through many dark days, and I am sure that I will have many more but;
 I hope by my life, you will know that God lives and that our future...is as bright as our Faith!
Thanks for always being there.
Have a great day! 
I found my quotes and scriptures from here:

One lady, one small act of kindness.

Today I went backwards just a step or so, maybe I was up too long yesterday. So I stayed low and started the diet that I have to do before tomorrow's PET scan. But at least I got a great surprised from Brad and Krystal today. It was an I Pad. I couldn't believe it, they sent it to me so we could keep in touch more with Face Time. Brad also is trying to help me out with my drawing, he showed me when he was home for Christmas; how he used his IPad for so many of his creations. I think he is trying to get his Mother to learn how to move up in this technology filled world. I guess I really am challenged that way, ok... maybe even a little embarrassing at it!
Hopefully my IPad will give me something to think about tomorrow other than the test.

I loved this story in the news about an elderly lady, who took time out of her day to do some small act of kindness, which made a big difference to a lot of kids.
Good night dear friends!

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We both are feeling better!

Amy sent me this photo of Audrey. She has had a terrible cold and that is why she and her Nana have had to stay apart for so long.


 I wished that I had been healthy to just go up and hold her and give Amy a break. I think that must be a Nana thing, because I felt the same way when I found out that our little Kai had a cold and an earache last week. I was always under the impression that when you were the Grandma, that you would be the healthy one that comes to the aide of your children and grandchildren. Yet for a large part of my life...it has been the other way around. My kids and my grandkids have helped me back to health, on more than one occasion.
I am so grateful to see her little smile, and to see the energy she has again to make big misses like this one. I am grateful that for the last 3 days, I have had some relief from my body aches and fever. I am grateful that my breathing is less labored. I actually took a shower today, dried my hair and fixed something to eat, all without having to take a rest or nap in between.
 Most of all I am grateful that I feel happy and hopeful again. I was getting pretty low there for awhile. I know it is because of all the love, concern, prayers and kindness ...each of you have shown me. I am forever grateful!
Good night dear friends

Gratitude... it puts things in perspective!

(First of all, sorry about the poster adds or whatever that is on my blog, Jeff worked on my computer tonight so that we could get Skype up and working and after he did, all of a sudden I had these posters or something under my picture. We will get that fixed. )

Today I went and had a procedure called Vitamin Infusion, it is where they put an IV in your arm and then push through a ton of vitamins, in hopes to strengthen my exhausted immune system; that doesn't seem to want to fight any more. My blood pressure was low ( which is usually the case for me ) when I came in and so he said I might be a little light headed afterwards. I did feel light headed and just sat for awhile, and then had to get some water in me, pay the bill and prayed that I would get home safely. I know you are probably thinking I shouldn't have been driving today, why didn't you call me? You would be right... but I didn't think of planning a ride in advance and told Jeff I would be fine the night before. So I just came home and went to bed, hoping when I woke up I would feel incredible ( ok, at least a little bit better) and would fill the next few hours (till Jeff came home)...with something___________? Can't even think of that. Maybe the results will come tomorrow or the next day, he said that the effects are different on everyone. So I am praying tomorrow will be a better day.
Loved this letter from Jason Wright to a soldier. It made me stop and think about something else other than my problems...that is a much healthier place to be.
Good night dear friends

Letter to a soldier on an Alaskan Airlines flight from Washington, D.C. to Seattle

 

I’m sorry.

Early on Feb. 9, in the cold, black and blue hours of a winter Sunday, I said nothing.

I first saw you in your camouflage fatigues patiently waiting in the airport security line.

I spotted you later shuffling around the gate with a wide smile on your face waiting to board the six-hour, non-stop flight from Ronald Reagan Washington National Airport to Seattle-Tacoma International.

I watched a hurried woman stop and thank you for your service. You were so kind, so gracious, so humble.

Still, I said nothing.

I don’t know your name, where you were coming from, or if Seattle was even your final destination. I could have asked all of those things.

More importantly, I could have thanked you for serving our country.

But, I didn’t.

I’m sorry.

I’ve certainly launched those conversations before. When it’s been convenient, I’ve stopped other service members in airports, restaurants and gas stations around the country. Like so many others, I’ve paid for meals when they were behind me in line or tucked into the neighboring booth.

Not today.

This morning I was too tired, too grouchy and too annoyed at my nasty head cold. Don’t you understand I’d been up since 4 a.m. and already driven 90 miles to the airport?

I saw you again when you boarded, but I was far too busy bemoaning my minuscule middle seat and complaining about our high-row number. I told my seat mates that we were so far back on the plane, our arrival time was 15 minutes later than those in first class.

Eventually, I settled in and allowed my mind to wander up to your row. Where were were you stationed? How long had you been in the military? Were you going home for good, or only for a few short days that pass too fast?

Who would be waiting for you on the other end? A beautiful bride who can barely catch her breath at the thought of seeing you descend the escalator? Young children with crayon and construction paper signs? A mother and father who will whisper prayers in your ear as they wrap their grateful arms around you?

I could have asked those things, too, but I was preoccupied with missing my own family already and we weren’t even airborne. Soldier, sometimes I’m gone for a day or two, maybe six or seven. Did you know I’ve even had a few trips run two full weeks? After grueling school assemblies and exhausting book signings, I absolutely ache to return home to my loved ones.

Fourteen days away from my family! In a row! I bet you can’t even imagine that, can you, Soldier?

I wonder where your service has taken you. What have you witnessed as you’ve sacrificed so much to protect and defend America and her allies? Have you been sitting at a small, metal desk in some green zone? Or are you a member of a special operations unit where losing your life is a real possibility every day you punch in?

Honestly, it doesn’t matter.

I believe the uniform doesn’t care where you’re serving and what your specific assignment is, it only cares that you’re wearing it. Honor doesn’t come from any particular type of service — it comes from the service itself.

I wish I’d told you that, too.

Instead, I blew my nose and felt sorry for myself and the work piling up back home. I’ve got too many projects, too many columns, too many Facebook posts to manage and an eternity of emails to sort. Working for myself presents so much unpredictability, anxiety and stress.

What a drag, right?

As for you and your colleagues in uniform? All you do is strap on a vest and hope that routine desert patrol isn’t your last.

Soldier, if I could have those moments back, I would shake your hand and thank you on behalf of everyone who feels more safe and secure because you’re doing work that many of us would not be courageous enough to do.

I would promise you that never again would I find myself so caught up in my own selfish discomfort to let you pass by. And I would suggest that if servicemen and women can do what they do, I can certainly do what I do.

I would say thank you for bravely going to work when you have a head cold and when life puts you in the middle seat.

I would say, “Thank you.”

 

smallest things

This a very true quote, it is the small and simple things that I am missing the most right now ...fresh air, my grandkids, my family, my friends, my work, my calling at church and a healthy body.
Another tough day, need to remember my blessings!
Good night dear friends!

 ,

Bigger Thank Me Days!

I have to admit the last few days have been Bigger Than Me Days! When you look at my flowers (that a dear friend), you can guess which flower is like my day today?

Another dear friend came by the other day, and brought me this bag of Sunshine! I thought that was a really nice and sweet idea. Everything in the bag was yellow, and fun... I have to remember this someday when I need to cheer  up when someone else has a Bigger Than Me Days! How grateful I am for the kindness of others.

 

Yesterday I went back to the Doctor to find out that I am fighting... yet another virus. Man, this is getting way too long. I will go to a infectious disease next week and hopefully he can shed more light on what is going on? Just until then, I need to remember all the things that I tell others when they are having their own Bigger Than Me Days!

Good night dear friends!

 

"Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quite voice at the end of the day...saying I will try again tomorrow"  ~ Mary Anne Radmacher

 

 

 

 

 

Stop and think about it!

Read this commentary and actually that is exactly what I was thinking while watching the movie. I loved that the story didn't end like they almost always do and that true love was self sacrifice of a dear sister. Maybe you will say that is over thinking it but I really thought this guy made a good point. Another tough day. Good night dear friends!

Are We Missing the Point of Frozen’s ‘Let It Go’?

The bright spot in this insufferably cold winter has been the success of the movie, Frozen, considered one of the best Disney films in decades.
We took the family to see the film on Thanksgiving weekend, fully expecting the common, tired storyline of a princess being true to herself and finding salvation through romantic love. It is the Disney dogma, after all.
Suprisingly, the movie’s storyline takes us in the opposite direction. The princess who is “true to herself” wreaks havoc on the world and leaves shattered relationships in her wake. Her devoted sister pursues her, even at great personal cost. And when all seems to be lost and you hope a prince will save the day with romantic love, there is instead a stunning portrait of self-sacrifice, described as the only kind of love that can melt a frozen heart.
It’s not hard to see the redemptive sketches in this movie. If you believe that love is more than just a feeling, that true love is expressed in self-sacrifice (which flows ultimately from Christ’s willingness to give His life for the world), and that true change can only take place through redemption not self-discovery, then you will find this movie delightful. More importantly, you will find ways to connect this movie’s theme to the gospel. We loved it.
The Success of “Let It Go”
Four months later, we’re still talking about Frozen. It has earned close to a billion dollars at the box office, surpassing the studio’s all-time best moneymaker, The Lion King (in inflated dollars). For months, it has been in the top five, and the soundtrack has spent considerable time at the top of the Billboard charts.
“Let it Go” is the stand-out song on the soundtrack due to its beautiful melody and memorable lyric. The music video has been viewed more than 88 million times. But the success of this particular song leaves me scratching my head, especially when you consider its place in Frozen’s storyline.
If there ever was a song that summed up the Disney doctrine of “being true to yourself” and “following your feelings” no matter the consequences, it’s “Let it Go.” Take a look at some of the lyrics:

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside.
Couldn’t keep it in, Heaven knows I tried.
Don’t let them in, don’t let them see.
Be the good girl you always have to be.
Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know.
Well, now they know!
Let it go, let it go!
Can’t hold it back any more.
Let it go, let it go!
Turn away and slam the door.
I don’t care what they’re going to say.
Let the storm rage on.
The cold never bothered me anyway.
It’s funny how some distance,
makes everything seem small.
And the fears that once controlled me, can’t get to me at all
It’s time to see what I can do,
to test the limits and break through.
No right, no wrong, no rules for me.
I’m free!

Thousands of little girls across the country are singing this song – a manifesto of sorts, a call to cast off restraint, rebel against unrealistic expectations and instead be true to whatever you feel most deeply inside. What’s ironic is that the movie’s storyline goes against the message of this song. When the princess decides to “let it go,” she brings terrible evil into the world. The fallout from her actions is devastating. “No right, no wrong, no rules for me” is the sin that isolates the princess and freezes her kingdom.
It’s only after sacrificial love saves her from the effects of the curse that the princess is free to redirect her passion and power – not in “turning away” and “slamming the door” and expressing herself – but in channeling her powers for the good of her people.
If there is a moral to Frozen, it’s that “letting it go” is self-centered and damaging. What’s needed is for our distinctive gifts to be stewarded and shaped by redemptive love.
Perhaps that’s why I’m flummoxed by the popularity of “Let It Go” (the song). Not from an artistic standpoint; it’s a gem. But I’m afraid its popularity drowns out the bigger and more beautiful point of the film.
Rebellion vs. Rule-keeping
A popular idea in our culture is that there are only two ways to live:

1. Through authenticity, expressed in rebellion against cultural constraints
2. Through an ordered life, expressed in rule-keeping

Many people see these as the only options. And sometimes, Christians are assumed to be lumped in with the second group – the rule-keepers of religion. To the stodgy, religious types, “Let It Go” is an anthem to the beauty of spontaneity and freedom.
But Christianity doesn’t see morality in either of these ways.
We don’t believe we are most true to ourselves when we embrace our deepest desires. The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked. We need deliverance from our deepest instincts, not celebration of them.
Neither does Christianity say we are most true to ourselves when we conceal our sin – as if by willpower, we can control our terrible tendencies. Some religious people may put forward the image of a rule-keeping, behavioral checklist. But that’s not true Christianity. The gospel frees us from the curse of the law.
The Glory of Self-Sacrifice
Christianity teaches explicitly what Frozen only hints at: salvation comes not through self-discovery or self-restraint, but through self-sacrifice.
All across the country, little girls are singing about self-discovery. Let’s make sure that after they see this wonderful film, they are given songs about self-sacrifice.
Found the article here:

Olympian says "It's Family First"

Watch the video here:

'It's always been us': Noelle Pikus-Pace on how family healed her from heartache, injury to compete in Sochi

    
 

Video: Noelle Pikus-Pace, who traveled to Sochi with her husband and children, joins Matt Lauer in Sochi to chat about competing in the Games in the women’s skeleton. She credits much of her success to having her family around. Her main goal? “This time, it’s about getting on that podium,” she says.

More than anything, a win would be a true celebration of their partnership, which has endured both tragedy and triumph as Pikus-Pace pursued Olympic greatness over the past decade. Pace has been there at every turn, offering council and support. When Pikus-Pace kept struggling to get comfortable on her sled about five years ago, her husband even decided to use his engineering experience to brainstorm the “perfect piece of equipment.”
Hurtling downhill headfirst at over 80 miles per hour, she competed victoriously on that sled in recent races, and plans to use it again in Sochi.

LIONEL BONAVENTURE / AFP - Getty Images

Pikus-Pace trains for Skeleton on February 10.

Their path to the 2014 Olympics has been anything but conventional. Last year, Pace, 33, left his job at a steel fabrication company so the couple and their two young children could attend Olympic-qualifying competitions together. Lacee, 6, and Traycen, 2, posed many times with their mother on the award podium, where she has been decorated with World Cup gold and silver medals in skeleton.
Globetrotting with two small children in tow might look daunting to most families, but the Paces have embraced the challenge. “Teamwork is really what it’s all about,” Janson Pace told TODAY.com.
Now that Pikus-Pace’s goal of an Olympic medal is within reach, the Paces are hopeful their hard work and sacrifices will lead to victory — so their regular Valentine’s Day dinner will have to wait until the Paces return home to Eagle Mountain, Utah.
“After being with the kids non-stop for the past 3 months straight,” Pikus-Pace said via email, “I am pretty sure we'll be looking for the grandparents when we get home so we can make that date happen!”

TOBIAS HASE / EPA

Pikus-Pace kisses her son Traycen after winning the women's Skeleton World Cup in Koenigssee near Berchtesgaden, Germany, on January 24.

Delayed date nights notwithstanding, this is exactly what the couple wanted: an once-in-a-lifetime experience as a family.
Just a few years ago, Pikus-Pace didn’t expect to compete in the 2014 Olympics. A decade ago, she was considered the best in her sport, having won the overall World Cup title in 2004-2005. But when a runaway bobsled struck her at a 2005 competition in Canada, her leg was badly broken, and the accident ended her chances of competing at the 2006 Olympics in Turin, Italy. A comeback was marked by disappointment when, at the Vancouver Olympics in 2010, Pikus-Pace placed fourth and didn’t medal.
She retired soon after, but returned to the sport after experiencing yet another tragedy — a miscarriage— in the spring of 2012.
“I really needed the distraction, turning my mind from loss and heartache to compete again,” she told TODAY.com. “I was looking forward to another goal, and it was chasing this Olympic dream together with my husband, something we felt strongly that was meant to be.”

Scott Halleran / Getty Images

Noelle Pikus-Pace and her family in the Olympic Park in Sochi, Russia on Feb. 3, 2014.

Pace knew it would be easier for his wife to endure the grueling qualifying season with the children in tow; there would be no anxiety about being away from home. Yet, this was an expensive proposition. The U.S. covers some of Pikus-Pace’s competition costs, but the family had to spend a small fortune last year to fund both her race-related expenses and the family’s travel.
Luckily, they received support from unexpected places. Inspired by Pikus-Pace’s story, one woman handed her a check for $30,000. Friends and fans donated money, coordinated a bake sale, held a 5K race, and put on a golf tournament. Corporate sponsors, including Kellogg’s, have since eased the financial burden.
The family is grateful: “Our team is a lot bigger than just the four of us,” said Pace, who will also be watching his wife from the point of view of his role as "sled-builder."
“If she can compete on that sled and win a gold medal, I’m going to be ecstatic and it will be a story that we’ll remember for the rest of our lives,” he said.
For Pikus-Pace, the custom sled is a reminder of the couple’s enduring partnership. “It’s never been only me crossing finish line,” she said. “It’s always been us.”

Kindness matters!

I am always amazed at the kindness of others. When I read this quote below, I thought how true!

"Life is short. Never miss an opportunity to perfect your own humanity. Love is simple. In fact it is all that we truly have. It binds us. It makes us who we are. It is not the coat that keeps us warm, it is love. Give what you can. Do what you must. Be more human. "

We have felt overwhelmed with the love, concern and kindness all of you have shown to us, since I have been sick. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts. Someone asked if I am going stir crazy in the house all day? Actually...no, I haven't felt good enough to do anything or any hobby around the house. I have felt terribly lonely, when Jeff is home and we eat dinner at 6:00pm, I just look at the clock and realize that he will go to be in 4 1/2 hours and I won't see him for another whole day. It was that type of thinking that has been hard not to get down about. There have been so many friends that have offered to come over, or said I could call. But honestly, I haven't even had the energy to visit or talk. Doing my blog each night made me try to focus on something positive, so that was a blessing.
Here is my update from the appointment today!
It's Date Night and I think we are going to have another one at home! Who cares, at least I have another human being with me! And a very handsome one at that! :)
Good night dear friends!

Just an update to let you know we just got back from the pulmonary specialist. Good news is that everything looks like it is on the mend. No problems with my lungs, other than the bronchitis... that I am still fighting. He thinks when that gets better, that the inflammation in my lungs will go down and I will start breathing easier. I don't have strep which they tested me for yesterday. And hopefully on Monday we will get another negative result back, from the virus culture they did.

 As for my energy, he just thinks because of being sick for 8 weeks... that all my calories, energy everything has been going to fight these infections, but that too should improve. Now the trick is to stay in, so I don't catch anything else while my immune system is weak and then to slowly build my stamina and strength back. Of course right now that isn't a problem because I am so tired and weak. Might be a different subject when I feel really good!

He didn't seemed to surprised, he said he has seen this sorta thing happen often after someone has had pneumonia for weeks. He said it has been a very bad year.

Funny, I went in there with the worry of cancer or something like that, but as soon as he said that all looked great, then I started wondering... but are you going to give me something to help me breath better? The answer was no and if I need to, then next week I could go in and do more breathing tests and see what to do from there. I should have been more grateful, I felt like was some.. but struggling to breath is sort of a panicky feeling.

But all in all, our prayers were answered that it wasn't anything horrible. Just need to rebuild my poor body back up,  from being sick so long.

Thanks so much for all love and concern!

Good friends!

I thought this card was too funny and so true! I haven't had many visitors in the past 8 weeks, and I am not actually suppose to... until we figure out what is wrong with me. But the ones that have come, I realized are good friends, because I really didn't clean up for them. I didn't even put on my face and I haven't even taken down my Christmas/ Winter decorations either! Now that must mean I am really sick! :)

Headed to the DR today, she was discouraged that this 3rd antibiotic isn't doing it's job and neither is the nebulizer. She checked my throat and said she was worried about strep so she took a culture. Then she did a culture on my nose and sinuses to check for the flu virus. She showed me the chest x rays and I still have bronchitis and she said they can see that the bronchial tubes are narrowed because of something... bacteria related? She wasn't sure, but that is why I feel so bad, straining to get air and winded easily. So she is sending me to a pulmonary specialist tomorrow and we will go from there!

 

Thanks for your prayers and thoughts, that means a lot. I need to just stay hopeful and trust that my Heavenly Father will help us find more answers soon.

 

P.S.  Oh I forgot to tell you that tonight when Jeff got dinner we got a fortune cookie with it, guess what mine said? " Now is a good time to finish up old tasks" then I asked to see the other one maybe it would be better and more positive. Here is what it said " Now is a good time to start a new hobby or collections"

Gee, I guess that means I will never get out of here! :) Actually I wouldn't mind to have the energy to either one of those! :)