Now normally when I have a Bigger Than Me Day, I share it with you. I believe that talking to others does help, plus I think it is good for everyone to know... that we all have those days that seem bigger than us! My problem for the past week or so, is that I have had a few of those Bigger Than Me Days in a row and I feel in some way that I am under water and not able to come up for air. I keep waiting for someone to grab me and get me to the top for air...when in reality...I realize I have to get there all by myself!
Some of the things I have been struggling with...I really can't blog about. Usually I can share some of it as long as I don't get too personal but some of it, I still can't share. Some of it can, and that is the little bit I will talk about tonight. I have recently found out that in a family( that I know), has had abuse in it. One of the children ( now adults ) came out with it over the holidays, and I have been in close touch with the victim and the family members.
Now you may be thinking...but Lynn, don't you counsel quite often with victims of abuse? Yes, I do. But normally I don't really know the people very well, they are usually friends with someone that I know. This time was different, I know this whole family and it breaks my heart. I had suspected it for years but...when the reality really hits, it is hard. Why is it hard for me this time? Well, sometimes there are certain things in their stories of abuse that are very close to what I experienced. When it hits too close, those are called triggers and.... some times I get my nightmares back, or other physical illnesses that I used to have. Isn't it amazing that the mind is that powerful, to trigger those things with our bodies? This definitely proves the whole MIND/BODY connection!
Then on top of all that I got hit in my new car, not a lot of damage to the car... but enough. Plus, my neck hasn't stopped hurting so...being in pain hasn't helped my perspective either. But I know that there is something to learn in each of these experiences....so that is what I am going to try to do...understand and learn more. Thanks for your patience, for those of you who kow a bit more...thanks for your prayers. It was a tough Christmas, beautiful in many ways and yet tough. I think I am ready for a New Year to start! :)
Good night dear friends!
( These are some quotes I need to have taped on my mirror )