Good Night dear friends!
I read the article HERE:
10 WAYS TO RAISE A CONFIDENT BABY/TODDLER
1. Slow down your life long enough to play with them.
This shows them that they are important and what they are doing is important. I’ll be honest, sometimes their games can get boring, especially when they get really repetitive but remember to them it’s a BIG deal. Dinner can always be delayed 20 minutes, unplug and just sit on the floor next to them or play chase through the house, they’ll be big before you know it.
2. Encourage independent exploration and learning.
Give them time to play on their own, without entertaining them, so they can explore, imagine and figure it out by themselves. Do this a little bit everyday. We also love to set up sensory bins and then let them free play however they like with it.
3.Baby Proof the right way.
Proof your house enough that you don’t have to say no to everything he/she tries to grab (and so they are safe!) but not too much that they never have to learn boundaries. This is such a balance, you will learn as you go and make changes and adjustments as you realize what is and isn’t working. Our house is baby proofed as follows:
-Anything that is dangerous is proofed!
-Things I would be upset if she touched I have moved out of her reach. This way I don’t have to say “no” constantly.
-Her toys are all within her reach. She knows where they are and can get them out whenever she is in the mood.
-There are 2 kitchen cabinets that are baby proofed shut and the rest are free for her to open they are full of baby safe stuff like pots and pans, tupperwear and more.
-Books have been left within her reach but she knows they are a special privilege and are to be handled with care. I have spent hours and hours with her next to the book shelf, helping teach her how to be gentle with the books. She has a separate shelf in a different room with her baby books and these she’s rougher with. She is not even 1 and she has started to learn the difference.
4. Make things reachable for them on their own.
For example, our keyboard has been moved from up on a stand to now sitting directly on the floor. This way she can reach it and play it anytime she’s in the mood to create music.
5. Allow them to do “big kid” tasks with you.
That way instead of them being around your feet, getting in the way and running down your patience they are involved with what you are doing.
When I cook, baby cooks. I’ll usually set her up in her high chair so she’s at counter height and fill her tray with cooking materials. It’s different every time. Sometimes she gets tupperware and plastic measuring cups, other days she gets a scoop of coconut oil for her to play with, squish and eat.
When I unload the dishwasher, baby unloads it too. She can reach the silverware. I clear away all the knives and sharp utensils before she makes her way in and then while I unload the rest of the dishes she unloads the silverware tray. Yes, she is simply unloading it and dropping it on the floor but I smile and tell her thanks for helping. Her hands are busy, which keeps me happy, and she has confidence in herself learning a new task! As she grows older we’ll start to slowly show her a place to put the silverware, keeping it at her height in a cabinet instead of in the typical drawer, which she wouldn’t be able to reach.
6. Show them how to complete tasks on their own.
Instead of getting the toy box out for them, show them how to open the cabinet and grab the box out themselves. But be warned, there are some tasks I wish I wouldn’t have taught her how to do and I did so on accident. After watching me once, she’s an expert on turning the DVD player and opening the disc drive. But again this has been an opportunity to teach her boundary. Rather than move it out of her reach we have taught her gently that it’s not hers to play with and that she needs to “find something else” to play with. Simply saying the words “find something else” doesn’t cut it, I had to take the time, guide her away and show her other toys at the same time, it took a few tries but then she got it.
7. Teach them to be confident communicators.
This point, along with many of the others, is one that you should continue to train them in for the rest of their childhood. For babies teaching them to communicated is obviously going to look very different than with your older kids, baby sign is a great place to start. I’ll admit we aren’t great at it, I don’t have the time to learn a million and one signs myself but honestly you don’t need a million signs. Small things like waving your hands after a meal to signal “all done” are big lessons in and of themselves.
Don’t get overwhelmed with baby sign, you don’t even have to get a book, a super simple thing like waving good-bye is a great lesson, too!
8. Limit how often you say “no.”
Little ones will respond more positively if you reroute and show them what they can do instead. There are times when no is necessary but more often than not redirecting them towards a positive choice works much better while keeping their confidence intact.
9. Notice their accomplishments!
Praise! Praise! Praise that little baby. Notice those small things they are doing, they things they are figuring out. Watch their little brains work and when they solve something or learn a new skill, notice and get excited with them!
10. Instill a strong feeling of trust.
It’s important that they know they are safe and know that you are always there for them. It’s never, ever too early to learn this. From day 1 your snuggles are already teaching them this lesson. I’ve also made it point to never sneak out and leave, I always kiss her good-bye, give her hugs, tell her I’ll be back and then wave bye-bye. Remember babies are people too and how you train them now is what they will come to expect as they grow as well.
And allow them to have personal space. Just because they are little doesn’t mean they have to have strangers touch forced on them. If your child doesn’t want to be hugged or picked up by a new person, respect that. Give them time to warm up to new people.
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